The Lady M Writes

I'm still Alive... Just getting functioning...

2007-04-30T15:02:00.000-08:00

And thinking about life and writing and graphics again.

Almost there.

Treatment was awful - wouldn't wish it upon anyone.

I've missed you all.

Lady M

Treatment - and I'm still alive.

2006-08-07T19:06:00.000-08:00

Thank you all for your comments and otherwise well wishes... Hey even the spam patrol ran through here. *G*

I started treatment - ordered to do so immediately or start hunting for a new liver.

How lovely.

I'm taking pegasys and copegus - which has some very nasty side effects. Mostly the lack of energy that even a cup of coffee and 40 pounds of caffiene couldn't phase.

A little naseauated and the worst is the shivers. You get cold all of a sudden - for no reason and then you sweat in mass rivulets. Oh joy. LOL!

I won't be posting much in the next month until I get used to this treatment. But everyonce in awhile I do surf to your pages and visit you. I just don't have the energy right now inbetween the kid, hubby, treatment, work to type much. Clicking the mouse kind of expends it.

Strange - 8 weeks ago, life was abundant of energy and I could stay up 24 hours plus without any problem. Now I'm lucky if I can do 10 hours straight.

But the good news is that I know I'm going to kick this idiotic virus. And that's all that matters in my life right now. I want to see my kid graduate. And I don't want anyone else's liver, if I can help it.

Nothing personal - just... I dunno - I think there's someone out there who might need it more than me or something weird like that.

Vampire Kitty Cat - please keep writing.

Savvy - love you hon - you know you're awesome - always will be.

B - girl - you think so much... and it's cool.

Tanya - sweetie pie - much miss you too.

Jeff - Oooh sometimes I just want to pinch your cheeks.

Mark - you're amazing with all the work you do.

Karl - you're forever my angel.

Heather - rock on girl.

And everyone else - you're just awesome and thank you!

Lady M

Just a quick update...

2006-07-07T05:59:00.000-08:00

Saturday family leaves to go to Texas.

Wednesday I go down for treatment, biopsy, etc. So I probably won't post until I get back on or around the 17th. (Until then, I'll be just freaking out and trying to get the insurance in order, etc.)

Thank you all for your heartfelt words and best wishes. I'll take all of those to the bank to make me feel better. They've given me smiles - and that's just superb.

Hugs to each of you.

LMAO - at Heather - no wipes. Too funny.

You're all very special people and I'm glad to know you.

Lady M

For Amanda Brice - Heather - LOOKING 4 LOVE - MOCK COVER

2006-06-27T22:21:00.000-08:00

For Heather - Amanda Brice - 4 women in DC Looking 4 love....

I hope you like it!

Lady M

Mark Pettus - MOCK COVER - For COWBOY POET DIARY

2006-06-27T20:35:00.000-08:00

This one is For Mark - Mark - I took liberties with the concept... LOL!

Hugs to you - and thank you for your wonderful writing!

Lady M

I APOLOGIZE PROFUSELY For my absence.

2006-06-27T19:40:00.000-08:00

First - I'd like to thank everyone who wrote me - I have had several hundreds of emails to pour through - and I thank you all for your thoughts and keeping me in your mind.

There's no easy way to just up and tell folks what happens in your life - but life can and does change overnight.

Sit down and grab a cup of coffee....

Somewhere around our lice catastrophe and and my daughter breaking her arm, I started getting pretty fatigued. I started having problems remembering things. Not like what car keys are - but when did I last have them, oh... they're in my hands. Or what was I talking about... or what did you ask me to do? (I'm sure this one annoyed my boss... LMAO!)

Anyhow - Of course - me, feeling like I've been a hypochondriac all my life... I've always had aches and pains... felt icky and a little under the weather... I chalked it all up to getting older and being a parent - and being married. LOL!

But when I couldn't remember a task someone told me to do only 5 minutes before, I started getting a little worried. And then, my cartilage in my ribcage felt like it was separating and there was a horrible pain under my ribs in the back.

Me - I figure I've got diabetes. So I go in for the tests....

Noooooo... Not diabetes. Not cancer. Not you're nuts go home...

The last thing I expected - Hepatitis C. In advanced cirhosis stage.

Say WHAT?

Like how the "F" did I get Hep C? (OK - I'm NOT a virgin... but I've always practiced safe sex - and my hubby - well he's been a pretty safe guy too. I HATE needles - and never really thought drugs were anything to mess with. Did I mention I HATE needles? Oh... Cause I couldn't remember. I was an EMT - but I never had a needle stick that I can remember - no openly bleeding people with me having unprotected cuts or wounds - nor did I remember anyone having any blood get into my eyes or mouth, etc.) AND - because I was an EMT - I was clear of all HEP viruses in 1991.

Turns out I've had 2 shots of Rhogam in my life and 2 surgeries. (Rhogam is a blood gamma globulin - used in women who are RH negative, with an RH positive father of the baby - so the woman's body doesn't miscarry the baby.) I had the Rhogam while I was pregnant with my daughter - who will be 10.

So - this was dropped in my lap... And while it was dropped in my lap - the internet server was out - for almost 3 weeks. They had to relay cable here to my house because the line goes under out pond which was frozen at the time. I live on the smallest community on an island in Alaska. Sigh - no information was available - I thought I was going to die or was dying right then...

Pass the XANAX - oh boy...

Unless of course you want a screaming, incoherent babbling woman - who has no idea what the *F* all this is...

So here I am thinking I'm going to die any day - LOL - ok - maybe in a few years - and no way to find out more information.

I'm one of the first people - clinically diagnosed with Hep C in our Community - so the doctors had no clue. I was poked from one end to the other ---- DID I MENTION I HATE NEEDLES?

So looking like a pin cushion we learn we have to find out what my viral load is - and what genotype... Of course the doctors didn't know we needed to find this information out...

And at the time, they didn't have the concept of all the things we were supposed to be looking for - etc. All fun... To be sure.

I got poked some more - while I'm having a practical breakdown - freaking out - afraid to touch anyone cause I might give it to them - and terrified that I'd passed it on to my kid.

I have to figure out who else I may have passed it on to ----- I'm panicked - yeah - let's just say the XANAX is a wonderful thing. A very wonderful thing. I've never had panic attacks before - and now I have - so my sincere sympathies to anyone who has ever had one!

Turns out - HEP C is not "THAT" contagious... It's pretty much a blood to blood issue - Not caught by hugs - or kisses - probably not even sex unless both people have openly bleeding cuts... Can't get it from toilet seats, showers, chairs, tables, other bodily fluids unless they contain blood --- but I didn't know that then - MORE XANAX please.

So - now we've narrowed it down to three possibles of how I got it - I've gotten much more information. I go in for a second biopsy on my liver - on July 13.

I have to fly out of here to do it. I'll be going on a treatment called PegInterferon/Ribivarin.

The forgetfulness was caused by an ammonia buildup because my liver wasn't processing it properly - and it was making me an absolute basket case on memory loss. It was one of the freakiest things I've ever seen happen to me.

The first couple of weeks - I was panicked - the third week I was kind of depressed - and then after we found out that my husband and daughter were completely clear of the virus - Everything started getting a little better.

The stuff they gave me to clear out the ammonia (lactu something make you pooo and vomit for hours and days) was icky...

But other than that - We just need to find out how bad it is - and if we can knock the virus down.

Which - THEN --- the GOOD news ---- We found my genotype was 3a... (Which is UNUSUAL in the US) However - has a 60 -70% clearance rate using the interferon/ribivarin.

They currently think the cirrhosis (I thought this was something only people who drank a lot of alcohol got... ha ha.... Ya learn something new every day....) is in middle stage - but with the next biopsy we will know for certain...

So ----- Now you know why I haven't been here- or much of anywhere. I'm sooooo very sorry for not talking. I wasn't mentally prepared for it and I was just totally exhausted just trying to be a mom and go to work. Thank GOD the hubby cleans. LOL!

To me - Hep C - well it was something Druggies and Prostitutes got...

Boy - was I wrong.

And now - I'm learning that it isn't even all that bad - Yeah, I'm sick right now - but chances are I will be getting better in the next 6 months.

I also have learned that if you tell people - which I plan to do... I don't think it is something I should be ashamed of... You have to tell them how they can and can not get it - with paper work from the CDC or something - because their first question is:

HOW did you get it? (Of course, as they back away slowly away, holding their breath and imagining the cooties jumping from me to them... )

It kind of hurt my feelings - but I had to laugh... When I told the girls at work - The next day - there were about 10 cannisters of Clorox Wipes Antibacterial in the bathroom and near the keyboards and phones... (First - those things don't kill the virus... sorry to disillusion you. Second - Hep C is NOT that contagious.... Sigh.... ) So instead of getting pissed off - I just didn't say anything - see - cause the way I see it - They are protecting me from their germs - because my immunities are down - LMAO!)

So needless to say - Yeah - I've neglected blogging - I've neglected a lot of things - Damn, I've got to clean my house - and right now there isn't enough coffee to feed me intravenously to give me the energy to move around.

I will be a little more active shortly and in a few minutes - I will post 2 covers I did the day before my life fell apart.

I'm picking up the pieces - so thanks for listening.

And know - I'm keeping my sense of humor - I'm a little freaked out still - but a lot better than last week - and a few weeks ago.

I've got a great family - and I've found the information I've needed for the things I'm supposed to expect and how to deal with this. My posting will return to more normal shortly - and I'll start doing covers again - for folks - because I LOVE doing them.

I just haven't been in the mental or physical state to talk about it- or even to get online to be sociable - or human.

Oh - pass the Xanax please. LOL!

I love you guys- and all of your emails --- I just got done going though about 800 emails and over 70 of them were from you guys - your made me smile and gave me tears - because you thought enough to care.

Hugs,

Lady M

Domynoe's Mock Cover - The Assassin's Choice - Denyse Loeb

2006-05-05T12:14:00.000-08:00

First - this young lady has worked VERY hard for her novel - which is the first in a Trilogy series.

Lots of detail and hard work. Not to mention - she's an artist.

The Woman in the picture ---- Denyse drew herself. I just cleaned up the outer edges and gave it some depth/transparency. So truly - She did the hard work - I just arranged it on a background. *G*

http://www.alden.nu is her website about this - but she has so many for awhile there, I wasn't sure what I was supposed to make it on. I made a few covers before I was happy with this one.

I think she'll like it!

Have a splendid day all - and yes - I've got more covers coming - but I'm low on time - so please know that they will be on the way fairly soon.

First Apologies - then I'll do a cover...

2006-05-05T11:59:00.000-08:00

Sorry I've been neglecting Blogger for the past week.

The connection ISP went down for 2 full days and was intermittent for 3 - they figured out that the cable that goes to our house froze under the pond in our front yard area and when it would freeze, it would shut off the cable. LMAO! So we had weather dependent cable - TV signal was fine... but the internet part wouldn't work - or it would work for a few moments and then nada.

That and the next door neighbor has a big Dodge and ran over the box. So we were broadsided. I could get a comment in if I could get it up - but only for a few moments. Ugggh.

Then my sweet petunia broke her wrist in 2 places which made us run from doctor to doctor trying to figure out if we had to fly off island to get an Orthopedic Surgeon because it cracked up into the growth plate. About a grand worth of visits and a grand worth of X-rays, and they full length casted her yesterday. Wooohoo! She went with light blue - and her classmates have already decorated it with 4th grade scrawlings. LOL! In 3 weeks they'll make another thousand dollars worth of decisions on whether she'll need surgery but for now, we're in the clear of having to fly outta here. (sigh).

Now she's "Your Highness".

"Mom, could you scratch my nose?" "Mom, could you get me a glass of water?" "Mom, could you write my homework for me?" "Mom could you change the channel?" "Mom could you zip my pants?" Moooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooom. *G*

Other than that the dog decided to go into shed mode.

This would be ok if we didn't have burgundy carpet - and she wasn't a light haired German Shepherd. We now have a beautiful light pink furry carpet that has to be cleaned 3 or 4 times a day from end to end. Part of me says - dog stays outside... the other part says she's part of the family and that's just life. LOL!

So - there - in a nutshell - ya have my life... Can we trade for a day? I'm sure your life is much more interesting.

Now on to Domy's cover. I think she'll like it. See ya on the next post.

Ta dah - Here she is... LOL

2006-04-30T03:06:00.000-08:00

Hi everyone - meet my kid.

Well - at least meet her lovely fractures.

Grrrrr... Internet ISP down for days...

2006-04-30T02:00:00.000-08:00

If anyone has emailed me - my provider has been up and down - and rejecting everything for 3 days. No online service for me for 3 days is like - uhmmmm can we say "torture"? I've been able to get a few comments in - as long as I don't take too long - (and we're talking me - the queen of the long winded post - GRIN)

And to top this lovely day off - LOL! My daughter went rollerskating and fractured her wrist in 2 places.

What a weekend - eh?

Hugs off to everyone - I'm not ignoring you - I promise!

Lady M

Larry Moon - Blue Moon Productions - Intimate Reflections Mock Cover

2006-04-22T03:07:00.000-08:00

For Larry - Sometimes getting the words on paper is the hardest thing. A little encouragement is all he needs!

This little Blog of Mine talks about life - as we know it. Poetry, memoirs and more. If you get a chance, go visit this very mild mannered guy - and I hope that this totally original cover makes him smile.

Please don't laugh at my inept artwork - LMAO! It really is a BLUE MOON (his design logo name) made into a flower... I tried - no peanuts thrown at me - alright? :P

Take it away Larry!

I'm waiting on an answer from Mark and from Domynoe - (Mark - what do you want it on... The blog - or something spectacular that you're writing? Ya know - I could do one just on your awesome chaps... LMAO! Domy --- I want more info on Arden. I sent an email. I think I could have a blast on that. Jeanette - OOooh Baby - just looking for the right images... )

Hugs all!

Lady M

Michelle As Leigh Royals Mock Cover - Contance of The Carolinas

2006-04-22T01:13:00.000-08:00

This one was probably the hardest one so far.

I learned a lot more on how to manipulate some of this program - and I put that learning to use in making this cover. Doing People on covers is not easy. Especially if you're trying for period costume dressing... So like all of the other covers - I took liberties with the author's descriptions and ideas - and implemented my own.

I thought about the story line - and what I imagined would be a "scene" set up out of it. What would happen if... And how does.... And where.... And that is how I came about making this particular cover.

Egads - while I know the people and costumes aren't perfect - I wish that I had a gaggle of props and images and models now - this is so much fun - I feel limited by the few things that I have... And like every woman in the world - LMAO! I want MORE!!!!

And now I invite you to ROMANCE DIVA's New Mock Cover:

Domynoe, BlueMoon, Mark and Jeanette are the next in line for book covers. Hugs to everyone.

Lady M

Please Go Visit Alexandra - She's not feeling well...

2006-04-19T06:57:00.000-08:00

And after being almost grilled by a car - I don't think most of us would be.

So - please go stop by and offer a word of cheer to Alexandra Wolfe at The Wry Writer.

Thanks. Night for now - Hugs to all - and Mark and Domynoe, youse guys are the next ones.

AGAIN - IF I HAVE MISSED YOU - PLEASE LET ME KNOW.

Rene Miller - Mock Cover - The Darkest Midnight

2006-04-19T05:31:00.000-08:00

Rene has such a sweet, lovely website that when she told me what her story concept was - I about fell over.

It was the last thing I expected: Paranormal, psuedo-horror, romance, gothic.

OK - so it wasn't so horror "ish" but when I read it, I kept getting this "dark" almost evil feel to the cover that I had to do it.

It may not be exactly what her story is about - but I will say I delighted in making the complete opposite concept of her website that I giggled the entire time making this.

On a side note - our darned ISP group crashed last night until this am and they let all of us know that it will be intermittent for the next day or so.

My days off are coming up and I LIVE for the web on my days off. LOL!

Grrrr. They better not.

I have Mark, Domyno as next and if I've missed you - Just poke your head in here and let me know please. I'm scatterbrained about this time of the week.

I'm telling you - these covers are fun to make... If I knew that I'd have this much fun doing them I would have persued doing this in college. They are exciting to watch take shape and the feelings behind them are simply amazing for me. OK - not as exciting as reading Savannah's yummy stuff - but pretty darn close.

OK - now for gorgeous Rene Miller! with her Cover - THE DARKEST MIDNIGHT:

Sela Carsen - Mock Cover for COLD RUNE!

2006-04-17T05:39:00.000-08:00

Sela has a great story line heading up!

I wanted to try more artsy - eerie - effect on this one - but with a touch of Sci-fi and Thriller in it.

I also wanted to implement the concept of the story - (Sela, I hope I got it about right - this is one of about 4 I was playing around with - and for some reason I liked this one best) A story she'll have to explain.

I'm working heavy shifts (if you guys haven't noticed I'm quiet on the blogster from Saturday to about Tues.) so I'll be doing the next requests. If I've missed you - let me know Rene and Mark are next.

I'm dying to hear what Brown Trout thinks of his! LOL!

Sela - let me know if it's anywhere near what your ideas were.

And without any more gabbing - here she is - SELA CARSEN in ALL Her GLORY!

Justin Rodgers Updates

2006-04-15T16:08:00.000-08:00

I'll post them in the reply section - they are Long.
This is one of my co-workers who MIRACULOUSLY survived a plane crash!

Anyone else up for a cover?

2006-04-14T06:39:00.000-08:00

I think I've finished everyone's cover besides Sela, which I'm waiting for an answer on some questions... and she's vacationing! *YAY-hope it's fun!*

So if I've missed your request - or you haven't made one - now is the time.

Shout out to Savannah who is taking a blogging break and hugs to everyone!

MARK - YOU OK?

THE BROWN TROUT - An HONOR to do - Mock Cover

2006-04-14T05:35:00.000-08:00

Very few people in the world can write something that affects me so much inside that I realize that there is an extreme LITERARY talent creating those words.

The Brown Trout - an author who prefers to remain anonymous, is exactly one of these types of people. This writer runs you through a gamut of emotions - stark, lively, funny, sad, abrupt, obnoxious, wistful, dreaming, sarcasm, wit and so many more, that it is quite wonderful to read.

Perhaps there is a braggart in all of us - but this writer - regardless of who He truly is or is not, does not matter. The words upon his blog have captured me - leaving me waiting to read more of the escapades of the mind and heart - that the writer adventures on. It is almost like stepping inside someone else's shoes for just a few moments.

The story is, in my imagination, a memoir of searching through life for that one thing - without knowing precisely what it is - but knowing you must search for it. Whether it be women, fishing, wine, flying, love ---- it doesn't matter - but the search for it does.

I took liberties with giving the book a title - and for all of the ideas and images behind the story. It is how I view this writer's style and life from what has been shared.

So without saying any more - other than you had better go read through this blog... It is a treasure you might miss if you don't... Here is the mock Cover for The Brown Trout's Next Book:

Brown Trout - I hope you enjoy this... And find it to be a part of you. -Lady M

PS. I'm waiting on some feedback from Sela to finish up her cover - she's on vacation and I have a few questions first.

PS. AGAIN... I never thought I'd be doing covers - but I've had more fun making these up for you AMAZING WRITERS!

Desie - Dracul Mock Cover...

2006-04-13T07:49:00.000-08:00

I'm not exactly sure how this is going to show up in Blogger. It could be an interesting match.

This cover is made to be "Mystical", time transcending and unique. I tried some new ideas and different tools (Freaking out every single move - *g*).

There are a lot of elements behind the story on this cover - let me just say, it is fantasy/reality/spiritual/justice/time space warp differences meshed together. It is neither here nor there, but all of it combined.

I didn't quite get the Sexing up into it - because it just didn't feel "sexy" to me... More of an ethereal dream quality - of truth and fantasy mixed together. It was a misty feel for me... like the edge of waking up, the dream still there, but your mind is already focused on work.

The puffin - well... that's just there because... well... because the author likes puffins. LOL! And I thought it would add a very unique edge to it! *G*

This one is very "ARTSY" and took time in the creation of it.

So I tried to capture that in the mock cover. I hope Dracul likes it.

OK - Blogger and I are having a disagreement - it doesn't want to upload the picture like Jo's so give me just a few more moments and I'll edit and add it.

MG Tarquini - Mock Cover For Lala Scrivano!

2006-04-12T07:35:00.000-08:00

Ladies and Gentlemen - I invite you to peruse MG Tarquini's - Lala Scrivano's New Adventures from the Snark Files!

Note the Versace glasses... The pants that have been dropped to the floor... Note the dripping diamonds of Lala's Author. Lala in Snarkville had an attitude that was simply dipped in gold and encrusted with sparklies.

I didn't want to go too overboard... Lala - from what I've seen - has many facets. Many different adventures and many different styles. For me - what stood out was her peering over her Versace glasses at the gentleman taking such good care of her. A Dynasty in that Adventure. :P

So MG - I hope you like it. It almost had whips and piles of books and all sorts of stuff, but then I sat down and thought about it. Lala has class and gumption. :P

Folks - do go visit MG. She's got lots of good information on her site for those who are into the craft of writing. Hurry - Go peek.

Savannah - Faith - Bernita - Tanya and other Erotica Authors!

2006-04-10T20:14:00.000-08:00

Hurry - check out this post on Kristen Nelson's Blog.

You might be interested: Erotica Authors - City that Never Sleeps

Some days are more creative than others...

2006-04-10T08:01:00.000-08:00

This is first - a shout out to Chris - if he happens to stumble on to this blog - as "if" he would, or "if" he would even care. Dude - one of these days...

Second - this is a call out - I've finished all the requested covers.

ANYONE ELSE WANT A COVER?

I've truly enjoyed making them and if you'll browse through the blog and the muddled up stories throughout the blog - you'll see 12 of them! Yikes!

So if anyone is interested - just ask - I'll be glad to make you happy!

Thank you all for the comments on my Flash Fiction Down below "The Trickle". The compliments coming from some of you humble me greatly. You're all such GREAT writers!

Alrighty then - I'll be heading off to sleep - and will check back in on your blogging lives tomorrow.

Hugs to all!

Lady M

Jo Bourne's Cover

2006-04-10T06:55:00.000-08:00

I read through Jo's site - and I learned a lot about her.

Mostly that she's a down to earth, nice lady - who loves animals.

One story particularly had me in stitches... The one about the cat up the tree... LOL!

Go read it and enjoy!

She's a writer of the Napoleonic Era (Is the the right way to say it?) of Historical Romance. So I penned a novel name for her - But I just HAD to implement the Tree... LMAO!

OK Jo - I hope you like it and I hope I spelled everything correctly!

Blogger and I had some issues with uploading this one... Grrrrr.

The Trickle....

2006-04-09T20:36:00.000-08:00

I know that I want to finish up Crime Dragon - but I want to write it when I'm in a very happy mood, because... well... because Bob deserves that! LOL!

I have this Flash story running through my mind and I want to share it with you.

The Trickle
Lady M

I've been sitting here, trying to die for hours.

It isn't my first time either.

Last time, I took some pills and washed them down with Jack Daniels. I can't stand Jack Daniels any more than I can stand my life so it seemed appropriate, some how. But I will be loved if I die. Somehow, I know this to the core of my very being.

The time before that, I tried to gas myself out of the house. The neighbors complained and beat on the walls, truly interrupting my plans. I mean, who wants to die with a ruckus going on of broomsticks hitting the ceiling? I think I can remember the sounds of those brooms, but it seems so distant now.

This time, I am a little more ingenious. I set my bath to nicely warm. Steamy curls of mist rolling off the claw foot tub surface. The water barely rippled by the slow flow of water. I immersed myself to chest level and sat there, letting my body relax after a nice glass of champagne.

I had bought Cristal, using the last of my savings. I deserved an expensive goodbye. It is my choice to feel elegant. To be glamorous in this one last picture frame of my life.

I take out the razor, careful not to cut my fingers. This must be clean, I think to myself.

This must look perfect.

I start at my left jugular vein and slice a gaping mouth into my throat. I do not feel the blood dripping down.

I feel nothing but a sigh of relief.

Yet...

I am concerned as I see the hand holding the blade is hairy, and does not have my manicured nails.

How can this be? I have done this myself, have I not?

What is that trickle?

I hear it.

Along with the lub dub dub slowing of my heart.

And who is that laughing?

What is a man doing in my bathroom?

How did he get in here?

Why am I in my bathtub?

What................................

"But your honor, my client says that she wanted to die and he did nothing but assist her wishes." The Defense Attorney paced as he spoke.

"Your client is a serial killer who drugs women and uses hypnosis on them to make them kill themselves." The Prosecutor announced, causing a murmur amongst the jury.

"I object!" The Defending attorney yelled.

"Overruled. Gentlemen, please." The Judge ordered from the bench. "I don't want to be here all day - Prosecution go ahead and finish your questioning."

"Do you practice hypnosis?" The Prosecutor asked.

All eyes looked expectantly at the man sitting under the glare of television cameras.

"Yes, " the man lisped out through a half smile.

"Did you hypnotize this lady?" The Prosecutor pointed to picture of a smiling woman.

"Yes," Another smile.

"Did you tell her to kill herself?"

"Objection - that is heresay!"

"I'll answer," the man looked at his attorney who sat in openmouthed shock looking at him as if he were vermin, and instead of arguing, the Defense sat down.

"I gave her what her heart desired. I told her she could be free with me. That I would always love her."

"You'd always love her?" The Prosecutor echoed.

"Of course. I love them all." He nodded.

"And you told her to commit suicide?" The Prosecutor prompted.

"No. I told her she had tried it before. That she had not suceeded."

"And?"

"And I told her if she wanted to be with me, she must succeed."

"She believed you? That she had tried before?"

"Of course, I'm no charlatan hypnotist. They all believe what I want them to." His chest puffed up with pride.

"And you make them go through with it?"

"No. I get them relaxed. I set them up and I tell them I will always love them as I slice their throats, using my own hand over theirs." He smiled up at the Prosecutor as if he were a child proud of his work.

"I see... " The Prosecutor took a few steps and turned. "Did you do this to the other women in those pictures?" He pointed at a row of beautiful women.

"I did. Everyone thought the women did it themselves." He said with a shy smile "They all wrote notes and let everyone know that they had planned this." He giggled, "I even had one call her boyfriend only moments before."

"That's why you never got caught?"

"Of course."

"What did you do with them?" The Prosecutor asked, amazed that he was getting the answers he already knew to be true.

"I tasted them. I loved them. I took them into my body. I truly loved them." His eyes took a dreamy far away look.

"Did you love them all?" The Prosecutor pointed at the pictures of the women again, trying to not show the disgust he felt.

"I did love them all. Down to the last trickle." He licked his lips as if tasting something satisfying.

If You Could, Would You? And for how long? Tell me the story....

2006-04-09T07:45:00.000-08:00

Alrighty then.

Here's the interesting idea that MagZ just gave me.

If you could change your SEXUAL GENDER for a specific amount of time...

Would you?

For how long?

What would be the first few things that you would do (ahem... besides feel yourself up.)

Where would you go - to see if it was really different?

Hmmmm?

Snark Contest

2006-04-08T21:32:00.000-08:00

While I hold no illusions of winning - now that the voting is done...

I shall admit which one is mine. LOL!

#2

That was a fun contest - thanks to Miss Snark! Please - if you haven't already - go visit this young lady.

Princess of Two Loves...

2006-04-08T05:00:00.000-08:00

Sometimes...

Just sometimes...

You meet someone - and you know... You just know you're supposed to be with them.

No matter what circumstances are in your life - you feel something deeply and you can't explain it.

A moment - a kiss... something.

And you don't know what it is.

You want to run your hands all over them - you want to kiss them and feel them below or above you. You want to mesh with them - yet, you don't even know them.

It's so passionate. It's beautiful and horrible at the same time. You have no idea where these feelings come from. You have no concept of what causes them - you shouldn't even be thinking them ----- yet... there they are.

I have that feeling for one person I've met and I can't explain it. It is magic and awful and beautiful at the same time.

It's like meeting a soul mate all of a sudden - and they don't recognize you.

And the saddest thing - it will never happen... not that I would want it to. But it will never happen.

So I walked into a room - and there they were - the person whom I've always felt this around.

And I couldn't say anything more stupid.

I couldn't say anything more plain.

I couldn't make my intentions more known.

I'm married, I think - but what is marriage...

I toss passion to the wind and remember who I am.

The Crown Princess. The Royal Family... Yet - there in front of me is the one I wish to be with... I go back to the mansion - and amongst the furs I dream.

Crafty Chica Cover - This one was fun!

2006-04-07T11:20:00.000-08:00

Actually - this one was a blast making...

Hubby got involved and drew the Dias De Muertos (forgive me - it means Day of the Dead - a very large celebration) picture.

I wanted to implement the authors own cigar box and creative lifestyle - so the glitter and art items represent the crafts and glitter that she so loves.

I also did not want to just "copy" her website and make something she already "had".

I opted for less bright Mexican colors - because I wanted to highlight the Skeleton and Frida PLUS the arts and crafts AND Glitter - and the originals that I did with those colors didn't mesh well. In fact they were so horrible my husband took offense - and he's Mexican. LMAO!

I have to admit this was probably one of the harder ones for me to do, even though it was fun - because my hubby took a lot of interest in it. Instead of me just doodling along and playing with things - he would stoop over my shoulder and say - "GET RID OF THAT! Or maybe you should add this." LOL! Ay yi yi!

The shoes represent the three women in her book - one is a Bohemian, one is a star beauty and one is your frumpy housewife.

The picture of Frida - a very famous Mexican artist - is one of Kathy's passions.

I hope this makes her smile - Everyone - Welcome Kathy Cano Murillo into the world with The Crafty Chica Chronicles!

LMAO!

2006-04-04T15:04:00.000-08:00

You guys - please ignore any artistic errors in the covers... I'm really new at this.

Please know that before I did Savannah's Mock cover way down at the bottom - I had never considered doing anything like these before.

I am very new to the programs and very new to trying things out. So some of the mock covers will look different as I try unique ideas out - that may or may not work - LOL!

Forgive ahead of time any errors on the artsmanship. I think I flunked Kindergarten art. Really. I think. Hugs to everyone visiting - have a splendid day!

Lady M

Lisa Pulliam - Cursed to Hate, Bound to Love Mock Cover

2006-04-04T14:43:00.000-08:00

This one is for Lisa Pulliam who has a lovely WIP for Cursed to Hate, Bound to Love... and from what she's told me about it and what I envision from the words on her site - this is my imagination of what I think the cover might look like! LOL!

Please take a moment to visit her site and check her sweet blog out!

Now - please note - she likes PINK... LOL! So - as a fitting tribute, pink is it.

These are Mock up Covers and the images used for them cannot be used for commercial purposes without written permission - so please - if you want to use them for something more than just fun, blogging and giggling around with friends and family - and you want to get serious about them - Please email me and I will do what I can to make it so you can use it commercially on products that will be sold or purchased.

May you have a splendid day - And I'm off to bed. I've got a couple more covers to do - if anyone else would like one - please just let me know!

Lady M

Ray Rhamey - Vampire Kitty-Cat Cover

2006-04-04T04:04:00.000-08:00

Alrighty Ray - I hope you like this one. LOL!

Doing the artwork was highly amusing... *G*

I'll try to do some more tonight - but if you guys haven't gone over to Ray's site and read about PATCH the vampire kitty-cat... Then you're totally missing out. This is one cute, well done WIP.

Go on... Go giggle. It's fun!

Not ignoring you...

2006-04-03T12:17:00.000-08:00

I'm pulling some long swing/grave shifts right now. And I lost an hour (precious hour) of sleep. :P

I'll post on the morrow. Hugs to everyone...

Vampire Kitty is next on the list for covers - if anyone else has requests that aren't in the last few cover posts - let me know in this one and I'll will gladly do them for you!

Lady M

Savannah's new Hottie Cover... G

2006-04-01T06:57:00.000-09:00

Savannah - I love this one. I'm sorry - but I was drooling while I made it.

I hope you semi like it... And you can add on to it - or take away as you like. Huggggs!

Does anyone get that brooding feeling from Mr. Macho?

A Word about My Art talents... Or lack thereof

2006-04-01T05:03:00.000-09:00

ROFLMAO!

Uhmmm... Until I was playing with Savannah's Cover as a joke mock up - yesterday - to make her smile, I had never thought to make a cover before.

I'm just learning (seriously - like as in last 2 days) how to use the program that lets me move things around.

So if the covers are horrid - or if you find something horribly wrong with them, I would like to apologize first hand. They are just figments of my imagination on how I see my fellow bloggers.

Most of which - you guys are writers ---- AND EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU DESERVES A COVER!!! You all deserve to be published. I go to some of your blogs and it makes me want to weep at all the incredible talent I see on those pages.

So - I figure - I'll give you all a little inspiration with the mock-ups and you guys do the leg work (or finger work, if you will). Now go get published! LOL!

Many Hugs to ALL of you.

Lady M

Lauren Roberts - Biblio Buffet Cover

2006-04-01T04:42:00.000-09:00

Lauren Roberts is the editor over at Biblio Buffet. Along with some very interesting folks, they write reviews on books... Not just your every day commercial fiction being churned out - but literary works - obscure works... And anything with print on it.

Now - When I went to her site to get to know her - I noticed that it is done very professionally. Very upstanding... But done in serious black and white. Like typeset pages.

So wanting to set the color fairy free - and give her something new and unique, I decided to play a little with the things that she works on: Paper, Memos, Books, and titles. I also wanted it to be very flamboyantly artsy - but touchable at the same time.

So - go stop by the Biblio Buffet - Read some of the hard efforts of the folks over there - and have a great time!

And here's Lauren's new Literary Masterpiece :P :

MaggieZ - The Cover

2006-04-01T01:48:00.000-09:00

Maggie is over on the Farm - so I had to think of what I would want to see from a farm - and of course... Animals were the forefront.

I read through her blog - down to the Horse Stomping incident and more! But I laughed the hardest when I read the recently posted story about the chicken who had been raised thinking she was human! So that one stuck in my head as I was making it. So I thought - ok - So Maggie is going to write short stories about life on the farm - and the animals who interact with her (Well, at least in my world, she is... LMAO!)

I came up with this - I hope you find it as charming as I found Maggie to be:

Cover For Miss Snark

2006-03-31T04:48:00.000-09:00

ROFLMAO! OK - I've gotten on a Kick... This one should tickle all of your funny bones.

If you would like me to joke up a cover for you - I'll be glad to - just pop me a comment - and let me know where your website is - that way I can take a look at it and think about how I feel - so that I can just go with the flow... LOL!

And to the witty Miss Snark - goes the dubious honors of a New Cover for a book she's never written... But some day ---- Might.

Crapometer Posting - Looking for Serious Feedback

2006-03-30T22:43:00.000-09:00

If you have a brief moment, my one chapter part was put on the CRAPOMETER - I would like some feedback, because this is a story I would like to sell...

And I could use all of the feedback to make it better. Feedback on the site would be fine - because it would put it all in one spot.

Especially wanting to make it a better hook to grab an agent by the ankles and dangle it, like a yummy worm, enticing them to really get excited about it. LOL!

It starts like this: (I've linked the words below to the actual story)

First Chapter
Prologue
He left the bodies there.

For Karl... I hope you enjoy this...

2006-03-30T14:08:00.000-09:00

When I think of you writing - although your column is witty and hysterical... I sometimes see you as a dreamer - as someone who could write a novel like this. (But I will admit, I don't know your last name other than E. LOL!)

Karl - has his own column - so go visit!

If anyone else would like me to imagine a cover based on what I know of your writing from your blogs - just speak up - I enjoy doing this... I'm done for today - but they truly are exciting and fun to build!

Lady M

For Jeff... His Cover...

2006-03-30T13:08:00.000-09:00

I couldn't help it - I had this image of your story in my head...

I know you haven't written it yet - but I can almost hear you typing it out. :P

For Jeff Neale - who IS going to be a Bestselling Author (and Yes -that is all one word for me!)

OK - so I got in the Mood to make another one...

2006-03-30T11:51:00.000-09:00

Maybe I'll make one for everyone - LMAO! They're hella fun to make you guys.

So Bernita - this one is for you.

Again - These are just for fun... Kind of how I see you as an author - in an artistic way. I have no idea if you'll like it or not - but ----- it kept me amused - *G*

Same notice as below - Bernita Harris does not endorse this fake cover - I'm just doing it for fun and something to do... Maybe I'll do Karl next... Ooooh fun...

May I welcome you all to another Best Seller (at least in my muddled up head :P ):

Whispered Leaves
By Bernita Harris

Savannah's New Made Up Cover.

2006-03-30T10:41:00.000-09:00

I got pretty bored when the ISP server went down. LMAO!

So... sometimes I get creative. I decided to play around with an idea for a cover of a book - and I just couldn't think of what I wanted to have on there... And Savannah's Sariah came to mind.

Now, granted - I'm not sure what Sariah is supposed to look like - or if Savannah's real name is Savannah Jordan... Or if she would ever consider naming a book such a thing... But never-the-less, I ambled on - laughing like a 2 year old the whole way through it.

I kinda like it. I have no idea what it will look like in the blog - so grin and bear it.

THIS IN NO WAY RESEMBLES SAVANNAH'S REAL SARIAH - NOR IS THIS ENDORSED BY SAVANNAH JORDAN - I WAS JUST PLAYING AROUND...

*But I thought she'd enjoy seeing what I was playing around with - since I couldn't get into her site to read this fantastic piece of erotica she just put up... LMAO!*

And without further ado...

The NUMBER ONE HOT SELLER

CHASING SARIAH
By Savannah Jordan.

Hugs kiddo - it was hella fun making it.

News on Justin - for those who want to know...

2006-03-28T13:30:00.000-09:00

The Kodiak Daily Mirror

Aeromedix

We're all still just hoping for the best. But sometimes it is nice to share with y'all the things that happen to those we care about.

Crime Dragon - Prologue / Chapters 1 - 3 Links

2006-03-27T06:20:00.000-09:00

For easier reading - I'm going to post links that will pop open a new window for each of the chapters of CRIME DRAGON... The on-the-fly writing that is the total fault of Anna Louise of Tor.

Truly - it is all her fault. *G*

Crime Dragon Prologue

Crime Dragon - Chapter 1

Crime Dragon - Chapter 2

Crime Dragon - Chapter 3

To Justin - Dude, Am I Glad!

2006-03-27T04:45:00.000-09:00

First I wanted to shout out to Justin Rodgers - one of the guys that works with me. He's out of Dillingham - and we're in Kodiak. Still, he's a part of our team and last week the plane he was flying crashed, and through amazing circumstances, he is still alive. Badly hurt - but alive I'm posting the story from THESTATUS.com (a patient/family website that lets the family post updated info).... We've been holding our breath for the last couple of days... Hoping he'd be fine - So without further ado - here's the story and the last update:

(Please ignore how the system typeset it.)

On Tuesday pm Justin was involved in an airplane accident while out trapping with his father out of Dillingham. Chuck spotted the crash, alerted search and rescue, several hours later Justin was recovered and sent to Providence for treatment. Lucky to be both alive and coherent, Justin was severely hypothermic and had sustained several major injuries which include but are not limited to the following:-many broken bones which include both ankles, tibia/fibula of right leg, hip/pelvic fractures of the right hip, cracked sternum, shoulder/clavicle/arm fractures of the left shoulder, left cheek/ocular bones of the face, and suspected cervial fracture to the neck.(The hip and shoulder remain dislocated at this time)- several moderate to severe lacerations over the body, as well as moderate to severe burns (2nd and 3rd degree).He arrived at Providence Wed. early morning and had surgery to repair some of the lower leg bone issues of the right leg on that same day. He will have surgery to begin the reparation of the right hip on Friday with possible shoulder/eye socket repair scheduled for Tuesday. These are the first of a very long series of reparative surgeries.Justin, although injured badly, is coherent and in good humor. Amazingly there seem to be no internal organ injuries and his cognitive faculties remain intact.They are keeping a close eye on him and his doctors are referring to him as a very, very strong and healthy man, and are amazed yet delighted with his condition and attitude.His wife Erika is here with him and is his rock, he is hers and they are holding firm together. Chuck and Jeanette are also present, as is his sister Jessica.Justin will remain in ICU until the end of the weekend, and only close family are able to visit him at this time, and this is limited as well. He will be at Providence for the next few weeks, but is currently in room 205 of ACCU for those who wish to send cards or notes. (He is not allowed to have flowers in the room at this time)However, we do have a visitation log book in the waiting area of the Adult Critical Care Unit for those who come to visit, and these encouraging notes are forwarded to Justin and he seems to truly appreciate them.Jessica is fielding most calls for the family at 398-8445.We would like to thank everyone for the outpouring of love and support for Justin and his family. We are in awe and infinately thankful for the prayers and support. Words cannot describe our appreciation.Justin and his family also want to personally thank the rescue team and all medical professionals who have helped him. Without them, we wouldn't have him.

news updates26-Mar-06 02:12 PM - : Sunday early pm....Justin continues to do better and had another night of restful sleep last night. His swelling is decreased which makes him more comfortable.Nutrition is really important for the healing of Justin's burns and the burn specialist wants Justin to be consuming 3,000 calories/day. This can speed up the healing of the burns by approximately two weeks. This dietary requirement is not bad news for Justin because this means he gets to have as many banana-chocolate milkshakes as he wants. They are also putting additional protein in them to push it along.Justin continues to do everything that his doctors and nurses ask of him. He is still in pain but the staff is attending to this issue as best as is humanely possible. The swelling on his left eye is going down, too. He is now better able to open it and we suspect that there is visual improvement in that eye as of this morning. While not offical from the eye doctor, Justin does believe he was able to see Brett Gibbens through his left eye this morning.Justin will be remaining in Adult Critical Care Unit of Providence through the weekend. We'd heard that they were considering moving him out, but apparently the professionals thought better of it. Frankly, this makes us (his family) a little more relaxed as well. So, he will be staying put and will have a few recharge days before surgery on Tuesday.So, lets address Tuesday's surgery. Tuesday afternoon Justin is scheduled for surgery on his left shoulder to attempt repair to that area. Currently the upper left arm is broken into approximately four pieces, the clavicle and scapula are broken as well, and they anticipate significant cartilage damage will be found. There will be two highly skilled orthopedic surgeons addresing shoulder issues during this surgery. Additionally, the eye specialist will be placing a plate in behind the left eye to lift it from it's current position, rebuilding the eye socket itself. This will occur while Justin is under anesthesia and is only expected to take 20-30 minutes. ( Please be reminded that the eye area is not causing him significant discomfort.) Also, we hope that they will have time to address burn care issues while he is knocked out like they did last time.Again, Justin is being a real trooper (tee hee..) and we continue to be immensely proud of him and in awe of his attitude and courage. We thank you for all of your sentiment and support and would like to encourage you all to keep it up. Thanks for everything, you people are all beautiful to us.

Crime Dragon - Chapter 3 published FINALLY - how weird.

2006-03-25T21:44:00.000-09:00

Blogspot is most definetely weird!

LMAO - Chapter three is three posts down...

Jeff - your idea came up. *G*. All of you - I will add your ideas in.... LMAO - even Alex's.

If anyone else has any requests, I'll put those in as well. LMAO!

Lady M

Test. Blogger Issues STILL?

2006-03-25T20:19:00.000-09:00

OK guys - BOB will make his wish in either a few moments or in a day. I promise that as long as Blogspot lets me post, I will get it up. *grin -not that kind of up*.

I've been able to get in - but when it publishes, it dissolves into something like a million hour wait. And when I click back, it is gone.

Twice I've written it out. So this time, I'm going to get smart... LOL... I'm going to copy and paste to Word first - before sending to post.

See ya in a bit.
Crossing fingers... Clicking Publish Post...

Woohoooo! I WON...

2006-03-23T08:31:00.000-09:00

Dudes and Dudettes - Check it out!

I won something from Slushpile - Yehaw!!

Thank you Scott, much appreciated. Y'all should visit this young man, as he deftly rounds up some excellent interviews, reviews and just over all commentary on the industry.

I'm already out there checking my mailbox... Is it here yet? :P

Crime Dragon - Chapter 3

2006-03-23T07:38:00.000-09:00

Bob stood in front of the candles, the wish swirling in his mind. He wondered if he should silently say the wish to himself - or speak it out loud. He decided on speaking it, just in case.

He cleared his throat. Use the wish wisely, echoed through his thoughts.

"I wish that I had the magic of the world my mother spoke of so that I could better the world, to be able to shapechange and use magic at my discretion in spells that will never fade unless I want them to, without any limitations on the type of magic I choose to use, nor any limits to the powers - as long as it will serve to make the world a better place."

He stood there, waiting to see if he felt any different, but nothing appeared to have changed. He leaned down and blew a gentle puff of air through his nostrils to blow out the candles. They didn't extinguish. Had he gotten the wish correct? Did he need to do anything else?

The Knights came into the room, all of them smiling, including Baxter. Bob wondered how they had known he had made his wish.

"And the wish has been made, yes?" The oldest Knight asked as he shuffled over to look at the still lit candles.

"I think so." Bob looked at Bax and raised the scaled area above his eye, in an unmistakeable expression of utter confusion.

"And what did you wish for Dragon boy?" Bax winked at him. "A harem of women? An unlimited supply of video games? What? What?"

Bob studied the knights quietly for a moment. Then he shrugged his shoulders.

"I wished that I was magical."

The Knights of Splendor looked knowingly at each other and all nodded. Bob thought they looked like the Three Wisemen, scratching their beards and standing there.

Baxter's father, Raymond clapped his hands and the candles extinguished.

"You've done well, my dear boy. Very well." Raymond said.

"I've done what well?" Bob asked.

"You've chosen the right path, the one that was hoped for."

"Hoped for by who?" Bob searched the faces of the Knights of Splendor, trying to get some sort of idea of what exactly was going on.

"Ayuh. Hmmmph." Said the oldest Knight, pulling on his beard for emphasis.

"Ayuh, Hummph, WHAT?" Bob almost roared, hating to be kept in the dark about anything.

"Patience lad." The second oldest smiled warmly. "Patience is what you need. We'll tell you at our own pace. Remember we're old, unlike you."

"It's not that Bob isn't old - he's just stupid." Bax snickered loud enough for Bob to hear.

Bob tossed a crumbled up napkin from the table at him, which Bax deftly caught and threw back at him - hitting him right on the chest.

"Ahem." The oldest Knight cleared his throat.

"Watch out dude, he cleared his throat - always a sure sign that you're about to get bored to death." Baxter said in a quiet aside to the dragon.

The dragon resisted the urge to kick Bax lightly in the shins. It would have been fun to watch him double over, but this just wasn't the time.

"Bob, we've been your guardians since the day you were hatched. We have watched over you and have given you safety." He nodded at the other Knights and walked towards the living room to sit down. The rest of the crowd followed him and took their places around the circular built couch area.

"We were given this duty from the first set of Knights of Splendor, who got their orders from Lithay. The Knights guarded your egg until it hatched, passing down the responsibility with each generation until you were a dragling about 100 years ago." He waved his hand in the air for showmanship. "We watched you grow from a dragling, my brother and I being your caretakers from 60 years ago until I passed it solely to my brother, who in turn passed it to Thomas and then from Thomas to Baxter's father Raymond... and then to Baxter." He waved at each of the Knights as he mentioned them.

This part of the history Bob knew, but was always fascinated by it.

"So, in reality, Bob, you were hatched 100 years ago, but your egg took 700 years to develop."

Bob nodded again, showing he already knew that much. He was sitting on the edge of the couch, tensed and ready to hear more. The light glistened off of his scales.

"When we were given the responsibility for your safety, we were given a set amount of jewels and told how to invest them in our lives, so that there would be an abundance of wealth for all of those who had the duty to protect you."

Bob knew that they had oodles of money, all of them - and he had never wanted for much.

The oldest Knight pulled out a ledger from his robes. He opened it and placed it on the coffee table in front of Bob. He pointed a gnarled finger at the last line entry: 500,000,000.00 was listed. In dollars. Money. Dinero. Mooolah... Bob's eyes widened.

"That my dear child, was ten years ago. We've stopped adding it to this ledger and have instead started online banking. As is the way of the present and the future. All of these funds are in your name with the acting Knight on Duty as the executor in case anything should happen or if you needed assistance."

Bob looked at the round numbers and tried to imagine what he would even be able to purchase with that much money. It was staggering. And this was from 10 years ago? Wow.

"We also have taken care of our families quite comfortably."

"You very well deserved it," Bob managed past the dry lump in his throat. This was simply astounding and breath taking.

"We'd like to think so Bob. You've been nothing but a delight for all of us through the years. Watching you grow and learn and become a young adult in dragon years." He cleared his throat and took a sip of water that Baxter had brought him. "Now, to the wish issue."

Bob leaned forward and waited eagerly.

"When your mother passed down the order for the Knights of Splendor to take up your care, she also gave us direct orders... We were to never tell you until your 800th birthday of your past or your money, least it influence you. We were to not tell you about magic until this day, least you began thinking of your wish and became greedy, plotting it and planning it for years ahead of time."

Another sip of water had Bob ready to strangle him for want of faster output of information. He had to sit on his hands to make sure that he didn't jump up and down in a temper tantrum like a child. He was an adult now.

"Well, your mother advised us that you might wish for magic. We had hoped that this is so. However, we have no Mathinike to aid you."

"Mathinike?" Bob looked around quizically at the others who sat impassive and relaxed on the sofas. Did everyone know the story except him?

"A rooted tree that held magical properties that when combined with Dragon magic, created all of the magic in the world." Thomas spoke up from beside Bob. "The last of the Mathinike was used in transporting your egg to safety and in ensuring your safety for up to 800 years. The rest was destroyed by humans before then."

"Does that mean without Mathinike, whatever it is, that I will have no magic, if... if... if that is what I wished for?"

"That is not for us to say, Bob," Raymond answered. "We cannot begin to fathom the way magic now works, if it works at all. We can only read what has been passed down from Father to Son in the last 800 years. The Oracle that spoke to your mother, who forsaw the future, stated that you would be the greatest dragon ever and that you would rule in magic."

"He's the only dragon - Ever." Bax added.

"Shhh." Thomas elbowed him lightly.

"So let me get this straight.... Some oracle-future-fortune-teller told my mother that I would have magic and that I would be great. But without Mathinike, some unknown tree that no longer exists, magic is defunct?"

"Great. He thinks he's going to be great... That'll be the day, Scaley can't even beat me at Halo 2." Baxter snorted out and earned another jab from Thomas.

"That's about it. How the world will work, with your wish, is unknown to us and we have done our part. So that, my dear child, is all there is to tell you." The Eldest Knight stood up and stretched. "Now, let's have some cake."

Everyone stood up, leaving Bob alone on the couch. For a moment, he felt entirely alone in the room full of the Knights of Splendor. He felt left out - but then... the cake's enticing chocolate aroma lifted his spirits and he walked over to the table.

"Dude, need some ice-cream?" Bax asked as he headed towards the freezer.

"There's hardly any left after you ate it all, too bad it's not a never ending supply of ice cream." Bob answered. "Still, if you want some, help yourself. If there's a little left over, I'll take a little.

Bax opened the door and then stood there in open mouthed shock. "Whoa dude - I thought you said there was hardly any left."

"Yeah, you ate all the Rocky Road."

"Uhm... Maybe you better check this out." Baxter opened the freezer doors wide.

Lining the entire compartment were cannisters of ice cream. Bob stepped closer to take a look. Every flavor that he liked was there. Phish Food. Rocky Road, Vanilla Bean, Strawberry Cheesecake and others.

"Alright who filled this up for my birthday?" He looked around to the older Knights of Splendor while Baxter just stared at the Freezer, trying to decide which one would be right.

"I think," the eldest Knight stroked his beard with a twinkle in his eyes, "I think... yes, I do... that your wish has just begun." And he picked up a fork and placed a bite of decadent chocolate cake in his mouth. "Move aside Baxter, you fool, I want some of that Rocky Road."

Color Test from Emeraldcite's Blog - Whoa... Dude...

2006-03-23T05:46:00.000-09:00

Talk about eerie...

Take it: http://www.colorquiz.com/

I took it from Emeraldcite's blog and I think it's worth going to visit.

Grab your Paxil before going.

Bob's One Wish - Still looking for some interesting tidbits

2006-03-22T09:35:00.000-09:00

I asked for the readers of Crime Dragon - a WIP on the Fly in the Blog to dazzle me with their input on what they think BOB should wish for - with his ONE wish.

(LMAO - sounds so professional for just blog ramblings.)

I've gotten:

Girlfriend
Koala bear ears
Unlimited Ice Cream
Unlimited wishes

Anyone else have any suggestions?

No matter silly, wise, romantic or what not - I will try to include it in the story - even if it doesn't make it as the "ONE WISH".

So think away you... Give me something extravagant or simple - or wildly hilarious. I'll put it in somewhere... LMAO!

Lady M

OK now here's the Interactive part of the Story...

2006-03-21T04:26:00.000-09:00

Get your latex gloves out folks...

I would like you to tell me what you think Bob's wish should be.

I have a few ideas of what I would like it to be - but I thought... hey - turn the story interactive.

I know where the story is heading... and a few differences might make it interesting.

So snap those gloves - dip your hands in and shout out your requests for "THE ONE WISH".

I'll be waiting.

My day on the blogs Reviewed:

On the by and by: Poetic Justice has closed down. I hope she keeps in contact.

Dana just Snarked Miss Snark - and Miss Snark LOVED it! Go read it... But put away the liquids first... And do put on your Depends. You'll need them.

Jeff has written a fab first chapter - this guy has some excellent skills of writing from a woman's point of view that it makes you appreciate his mother, his wife and all of the other ladies in his life!

Tanya at My Irrationalities put out the***CORRECTION*** (Tanya didn't write the review - she just put it up on her site so we could see the worst review in history - SORRY Tanya - We all know you'd never ever write something so horrid as that!!!!! You are far too kind, and a heckuva a lot better writer!) WORST Review ever made by a reviewer on Tess G. We're talking the reviewer needs to be saddled up to the shooting wall and wailed on with rubber bullets for a few hours. Whack that personality back into shape. Tanya has been putting out the snippets of Publisher's Lunch ---- and I'm so thankful that she does! Among asking some of the greatest questions around. Hurry up and go answer some of them - they're fun and inventive.

Alex has some grammar dos and don'ts... Boy did I catch some of my grave mistakes in there! But I have this compulsion to keep reading her ode to bras that hook in the front. Lordy Lordy Miss Alex. You give a gal something to laugh at! Go peek... but leave the bra hooked.

Savannah has Sariah in a back to back post - oh the girl is Sex-ay! If you don't know Sariah, then you don't know werewolves. So you better go get caught up on the whole erotica thing going on over there... This one will have you needing a towel... LOL! Hot mama!

Faith has some of her art work out. It's beautiful - go take a look. Nice stuff.

Trista has a cover coming out for her paranormal Vamp book - KUDOS! But she asks a decent question about ease of writing and changing from POV. If you've got a moment - go answer her.

A little unknown secret I have is going over to Lady T's website and catching up on all the reviews of stuff I couldn't see - because I work such weird hours... And she's a GREAT reviewer. So don't tell anyone... But do go visit. She does talk about Micah (LKH's new book) in her last post.

And my boy Karl - he keeps cracking me up... Without fail, I'm on the floor rolling with his columns and easy to read commentaries. Get ye there - or be square! Some off the wall stuff that you know you were thinking - although you'd never admit it! LOL! Go read the Superhero entry if you wanna roll on the floor a bit, holding your sides in.

Diana is taking folks on a memory stroll through some pictures - with a few added commentaries about the publishing industry - Great stuff Diana - LOVE the glacier walk one. If you don't know who Diana Peterfreund is, then you'd better take a moment and read about her. *g*

Kristen Painter has asked an interesting question about a Memorial issue - So go take a look... And think ROMANCE... Think everlasting... Or think plain old Yuck! No matter what you think... just take a moment to post it.

Gena has the Monday Beefcake - so worth going to visit - just to drool! Plus she tossed up some pics of herself with quite a few other ladies from the writing world. Take a gander... But the beefcake baby is MINE - hands off ---- eyeballs only. LOL!

Rene is asking for some vacation ideas - if you get a chance --- and have some great ideas - go on over and give her a shout. She's in need... Me - England would be fine. LOL! (WITHOUT THE KID and HUBBY... I wanna explore the crumbly castles... MY WAY... LOL!)

Bernita is writing more stories on Damie -- I think she's got a definite Kerouac touch to her writing... Almost screenplay material that is awesome to behold. So if you've been following Damie, or are just getting involved... Go check her out!

Agent Obscura has been running a "YOU BE THE AGENT" Quiz"lette". Go take part - BUT do not read previous answers. It's a very interesting experiment. I think you writers and bloggers will totally immerse yourselves in it and find it quite fascinating. Start here - don't read the other answers, or it will be no fun... But hold on to your hats, you're about to see what it's like to be an agent.

OK that's just a quick review on the stuff I read when I blog out.

Sweet dreams to all of you - and REMEMBER - you're all very good writers. Never stop believing that!

Lady M

VERY FIRST Rejection Response - Should I be totally Happy?

2006-03-19T08:14:00.000-09:00

I just got this rejection for a partial that was requested, from an agent, whom I hold in high esteem.

Now, keep in mind... I have seriously queried only one agent.

(My very first, and only other query was a blundering mistake that I wish I could sweep under the carpet and forget about - so we shall just pretend it never happened.... LOL!)

Some of you have had rejections before. Is this a canned response... OR - is this a response that should give me hope?

Any and all answers will be read.

AND IN NO WAY DO I THINK BADLY OF THE AGENT WHO RESPONDED WITH THIS. I WOULD MOST CERTAINLY CONSIDER THEM AGAIN.

*Me, I'm trying very hard to believe that this means - "yah dahlin' you're writing was good - just not something I can work with, with who I know... but hurry up and get it to another agent, because I think they might like it" *

And drum roll puhlease....

After a careful reading, I'm sorry to say that I don't believe I am the right agent for you.

You deserve an enthusiastic representative, so I recommend that you pursue other agents. After all, it just takes one "yes" and with so many different opinions out there, you could easily find the right match.

Well? Anyone?

:P

Crime Dragon - Chapter 2

2006-03-19T05:15:00.000-09:00

Ayuh - still writing - just got in from work, got the kid trying to break her piggy bank... I told her no, so she decided to get a toothpick to get all the quarters out through the slot - I suppose it's a creative way to follow my directions... LMAO - it's keeping her busy, so no complaints from me - I'll just put them all back in the piggy bank when she falls asleep.

Chapter 2

The Knights of Splendor stood around Bob's table. The Knights were made up of a trio of old men with white hairs and beards, Baxter and his father. The older men were Baxter's grandfather and two great uncles. All of them stood solemnly staring at the cake with the unlit candles. Eight of them. Each one signifying a hundred years.

Bob wondered why they hadn't lit the candles and was about to snort them into little flames when the eldest of the geriatric trio spoke.

"When we light these candles Bob, everything will be revealed to you - and our job of watching over you... Of our families watching over you, will be done."

Bob's heart beat fast in his scaled chest. What? Done? No more stewards from the Knights? Wait a minute.

"And when we give you the scroll, we ask that you take your time reading it and allow us to say our goodbyes." The old man continued.

"Wait a minute. What do you mean goodbyes?" Bob looked at them in disbelief. His dragon snout quivering in worry.

The old man sighed and looked at the others for confirmation. They nodded and he continued.

"Our job was to guarantee your safety until your 800th birthday. We have done what was asked of us. You must now become an adult on your own. You must choose your own path and we cannot interfere."

Panic settled into Bob's chest. What would he do without the only human contact he had been allowed? What would happen to him? Where would he go?

"What about Baxter?" His panicked eyes sought out each of the smiling Knights.

The middle old man stepped forward with a military precision and spoke. "Baxter may choose to stay or go. The Knights of Splendor will officially be over once your history is revealed." The second Great Uncle bowed his head, having spoken.

This meeting was so formal compared to all the previous meetings and especially compared to a birthday party. This felt like judge and jury instead of family. His blood raced through him as he began to feel insecurities weigh down on him. Icy tingles walked up his spine as he wondered what he would do without the Knights.

Bob risked a glance at Baxter who had his head bowed like the rest of the Knights of Splendor.

"What will happen to you all?" He asked quietly.

The last old man stepped closer to the table.

"We will all go back to our families and spend the rest of our lives, knowing we have done all that we could do to save you, like all of our forefathers before us." The third Great Uncle bowed his head and did not speak any further.

"What will I do without you all to take care of me?" Tears welled up in Bob's golden eyes.

"You will be fine Mr. Scaley," Bax spoke up, much to his great uncle's consternation. He quickly cleared his throat and bowed his head solmenly before anyone reached out and smacked him on the back of his head.

With nothing left to do, Bob reached for the cannister holding the scroll. For a moment, the world tunneled in on him but he forced himself to stand proud. His fingers hovered for a moment above the golden case. He steeled himself and touched it.

The moment his fingers touched the cannister, the candles on his birthday cake flared to life. Involuntarily his fingers closed around the cannister at the bizarre lighting. Surprised he clutched the cannister to his chest and looked at the candles curiously.

"What kind of trick is this, you guys?" He looked over at the Knights.

Baxter's father walked over to Bob.

"It is done my child." He patted Bob on the shoulder in a grandfatherly fashion. "Read and then make a wish and blow out the candles... They will stay lit until you have made your wish."

"I do hope he hurries," the middle uncle said. "I've been dying to try Elvira's chocolate cake."

"Oh do be quiet Thomas," The Eldest chided.

Bob stared down at the cannister in his hands and then back to the cake with the candles. He supposed it was now or never. He stalked over to a comfortable chair and held his breath for a moment. 800 years he had waited for this - and now, losing the Knights would be his reward. Some damn fine reward that was. He untied the crumbling leather lacings with reverence.

The Elder Knights and Baxter's father all quietly left the main room and stood outside the cavern, sipping mugs of tea or taking quick snatches from flasks. They had patience. And they would wait until his wish was taken.

Baxter looked back with a smile at his friend and charge for the last twenty years. He walked outside with the rest and stretched in the warm sunlight.

Bob barely noticed them leaving. His eyes focused on the intricate carvings on the gold. Detailed pictures of dragons. Like him. He'd only seen them online when he'd tried to find someone like himself out in the world. But no one had answered and the only other dragons he had found were fantasy creatures... myths... pieces of imagination. Where he was true flesh and blood dragon.

He slid the leather casing completely away from the golden tube. He carefully looked at the tube and then glanced at the candles. They were still burning and didn't appear to be losing any height, so he assumed that there was something special about them, but that would warrant a closer look when he was finished with this tube in front of him.

What's done is done, he thought and pulled the cannister open. He held it up to slide the leather parchment out. Eight perfectly cut 10 carat diamonds and two large blue sapphires fell into his hand as well. Bob carefully slid the jewels back into the cannister and closed it, placing it beside him in the chair.

He unfolded the parchment with reverence, afraid to tear it or damage it. He closed his eyes before it was completely open and held his breath for just one more moment. This was it. This was what he had waited all of his life for.

He opened his eyes and looked.

The words were scrawled in an elegant script.

To my Dearest child:

I am Lithay, the last female of the Splendor Dragons. The last dragon race of all. We were once a bountiful race, frolicking beside humans and working together.

But greed overtook those who hold such a short life

and those that fell into greed committed great crimes against the Dragons.

They destroyed the last of the magic in the world -

wanting no other force to be greater than they.

Not all humans are of this kind. Most humans are good, decent and of honor.

They are worthy of your love, your respect and of your protection.

But those that are not, have decided to destroy all dragons, for all time.

They come for me now, when you are just hatched and I must protect you.

I spoke with the Oracle Divine.

She advised me to send you to the future so that you may live a life free

of this hatred and menace and that you may continue on, where I leave off -

but in the future, where you may have a better chance of doing so.

I have entrusted your care to the Knights of Splendor -

they will take care of you through time.

I have left them instructions on how to find you in the future

and how to care for you until you reach your adulthood.

Toliver has written these instructions and I am sure that they will be followed.

My child of love I come to you on your 800th birthday to welcome you

into your adulthood.

Your very beginings were made from love and you will continue to be surrounded by love.

You are the last of your kind.

You hold the key to the survival of Dragons forever and

I believe in the Oracle when she says that you will be the greatest of all Dragons.

She says that you will overcome great obstacles and be an asset to the world.

I am already swelling with pride, my child.

With your 800th birthday, you will be given a wish.

One of magic.

Real magic, my son.

One where anything you wish for can happen.

Use this wish wisely to guarantee your safety and happiness.

Would I that I could be with you and watch you learn

how to talk and how to run and fly.

I will always be with you in spirit.

The Knights will be free to go and are no

longer to be servants for you as of this point on.

But treat them well, for they have been

everything to you that I could not be.

They are magnificent men and have

risked life and limb throughout history

to make sure you reached your 800th birthday.

A birthday marked by magic and splendor.

They are to leave you 10 gems so that you can live comfortably.

They have been paid and have been

instructed on how to make money grow in your world time,

so they should have amassed a fortune for you by now.

Be sure to reward them generously.

My son, I may be far away from you,

but you will always be in my heart of hearts.

Know that Toliver loves you as well.

Please ask the Knights someday soon for the stories

they have had to keep to themselves until now.

Make your wish son - and remember I love you.

Lithay

Dragon Splendor Queen of Trenton - Your loving mother

Bob reached up to wipe the tears from his cheeks as he held the parchment closer. It crumbled into dust against his chest. He did not cry more tears for this, since as he read, he had committed it to memory.

Each loving stroke.

He glanced over at the candles and closed his eyes for a moment. He stood up and walked over to the table.

His wish was held firmly in his mind as he blew out the candles.

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Crime Dragon - Chapter 1

2006-03-18T08:32:00.000-09:00

I'm still yanking this around. LOL! One word at a time. I just sit here and stare out my window as I type... Watching the snow fall - making the world look pristine and clean... And letting me get out of dog doody clean up for the day!!!! Yahoo!

This is the first chapter - you'll need to read the prologue to catch up - should be one post down. REMEMBER - this is ON THE FLY work. No editing - no fixing - just typing until I hit the publish post button. It's more fun that way. LOL!

OK - off we go - into the mindset of Lady M... Walk ye, carefully.

Chapter 1

The cars zipped by on the freeway, looking like ants from atop the bridge where Bob was perched. His wings shook off the rain as it drizzled down on top of him. He never understood why humans had to drive everywhere so quickly, but they all seemed in a rush to go in the same direction at once. His tail flicked back and forth like a cat.

Finally getting bored with looking like a gargoyle, he launched himself off the bridge and soared through the air. The wind lifting his wings and carrying him as he lazily rested in mid air.

No one would see him because it was dark, but Bob didn't like taking chances, so he avoided the urban housing. He went out over the countryside and settled at the base of Trenton Mountain.

He walked into his cave, upright, folding his wings against his back. He stood about seven feet tall. Almost human in form, if you didn't count the blue and green irridescent scales that covered his body. Or the wings that sprouted from his back. Or the long snout which ended in fangs. He had nimble fingers which could write and he could see better than any human ever could from long distances. But he still had a tail and could breathe fire.

Yet, sometimes he could go out at night in a trench coat and a hat, and most people would not notice him. Especially during Halloween.

Baxter thought he was funny. And Baxter was about his only communication with the world. Baxter hailed from a long line of stewards who had raised Bob through the centuries. Keeping him safe and protected. Bob didn't know the whole story yet, because no one had let him read the parchment scroll that had been passed down. But on his 800th birthday, they planned on celebrating and Baxter was actually going to let him read it.

Bob wasn't sure what was more interesting. The fact that he was going to turn eight hundred tomorrow, or the fact that he was going to finally find out what he was.

Baxter didn't care, just as long as he got to play with the Video games in the hidden cave.

Inside the cave were all the comforts of life. Comfortable furnishings that were large enough for Bob to be comfortable on. State of the art computers, televisions and communication devices.

For the last twenty five years, the cave had become more interesting. But it still didn't quench his thirst to find out about his past.

"So how was the traffic tonight?" Baxter asked in between taking a swig off a soda.

"It was great. Just like last night." Bob sighed as he grabbed his own soda, putting in a straw so he could drink it.

"Oh... don't be so hard on yourself." Baxter put the game on pause and looked up at the dragon.

"I'm just bored Bax. Bored. You know?" Bob shrugged. "I want to do something with my life. I want to go out and talk to people. I want to let them know I'm here."

"Not yet old man." Bax turned back to his game.

"Old man?" Bob snorted through his nostrils, plumes of smoke spiraling up.

"Yeah, well maybe you're not old enough, if you can't control that."

"I can control it," Bob said sullenly. "I just didn't want to."

"Yep. Sure thing, snake-boy."

"Oh, you're so lucky I promised your grandfather I wouldn't torch you."

"Keep talking Dinobreath."

"Give me a controller, I'm going to kick your ass." Bob reached for the controller that was on the ground.

"Like I said," Bax winked at him. "Keep talking Dinobreath."

They played amiably for a couple of hours and then it was time for the duo to crash.

"Hey Dude." Bax spoke when the lights were turned off and he was headed to his own chamber in the cave.

"Yeah?" Bob turned before slipping on top of his own Master bed set.

"Happy Birthday."

"Thanks, Dude," Bob lisped and pulled the flame proof blanket up to his chin.

I'll keep adding on to this later - gotta hit the hay - work in a few hours... Grrrr... Someday I want to just write for a living. You know? Make enough moeny to just write... BecauseI'm going to write anyway... it doesn't matter... Would be a dream come true if that's all I had to do in life, besides the family.

Ahhh well - I can dream, right? LOL!

Catchya laters. Dudes.

Crime Dragon - Prologue and why it was written

2006-03-18T02:41:00.000-09:00

On the Fly for Anna Louise - in a roundabout way because she said it couldn't work... I almost agreed with her until I realized that I am a writer.

I can make just about ANYTHING work. That's what I do. I mesh things together... I pull the imaginary out of thin air and create the images for the readers to take my imagination and make it, for a brief period of time... their own. They have the empty canvass, and I fill it full of paints - the readers sharpen the focus, or add to the color hues - but I give them the paint.

LMAO! On the fly means just typing - no editing - no looking back to see if it's working until you hit that publish post button.

No pre-making it up... Just letting the words and thoughts flow from your fingertips.

Prologue:

The human stood beside his mistress. He ran his roughened hands across her scales as she strained to birth the egg that would carry on her species.

"Toliver, please." She snorted out of her steaming nostrils, her reptilian tounge lisped the words as she pushed harder.

"They come, Lithay." He stood in sorrow before her, his head hung and defeated.

"How... Much... Time?" The great dragon paused, her eyes sealed shut against the strain.

"They've already killed your peasants in the village and are burning their way up the mountainside."

"Idiots." She hissed as a contraction took over. "I will have to do this faster then. We cannot let them have this egg."

"Yes Lithay."

He went to look outside the cavernous dwelling. Smoke covered the sky, the villages lay in ruins, burning. He could see the line of D'Angels Crusaders at the bottom of the mountain. He estimated they could be here in less than two hours if they pushed themselves.

He turned back to look at Lithay in all of her glory. The ruler of their lands for many centuries. She had been kind, loving and giving. She had protected her people and they in turn had provided her with sheep and respect. She had been a better ruler than most kings and had been generous without fault.

Now D'Angel wanted the lands. He had waited until she was weak in the last moments of gestation - then he had injured her. An arrow had felled her from the sky a few days ago, she had flown, injured back to her caves to give birth to her heir egg.

Lithay was the last of her kind. Dragons of Splendor had been exterminated as the greedy kings had chosen to wage war to steal lands. As the last of the dragon species, they had been the most beautiful - blue and irredescent green scales with lovely golden eyes. Toliver had faithfully tended her for the last century, but even her magic could not sustain him much longer, he was growing older as humans did.

Toliver stroked his beard and thought about what he would say to Lithay, who knew she was in mortal danger - no matter how immortal her species were supposed to be. Her magic was waning with her injury and the imminent birthing of the last egg.

"Toliver, shut up. I know it is bad. Pull out the herbs of the cabinet. Get them ready for my Death Wish." She ordered him as she gave one last push and the gleaming egg landed in the soft bed of hay. She immediately curled around it, bathing it with her soft tounge. Whispering to it all of her dreams and wishes.

Toliver turned to the cabinets and pulled down spices and a few containers. He poured something viscous and yellow into a stone bowl. Stirring with a silver rod, he poured the spices and tossed in a piece of Mathinike bark. The tree that held the magic of the lands in it. With the Dragons, the Mathinike bark were the only pieces of magic When the trees were gone and the dragons gone, there would be no more magic. Toliver's heart became heavy.

He looked at his mistress who was busy mothering the egg. She was the last of the Dragons. He held another sliver of Mathinike bark and put it into the mixture. He reached into the cabinet and pulled the last piece of Mathinike bark and put all of it into the bowl. If she was going to die, and she was ready for it, he wanted all of the magic left in the world to go into her wish.

He would do as she asked. No matter the cost to herself, Lithay had always ruled evenly and had always held firm. She had protected until she could no longer protect even herself.

"Toliver, do not look so sad. This was written about in the Oracle's words. I have known what was to pass and this is only another moment in time. Do not be afraid."

He looked up from his stirring to see her watching him, her golden eyes glowing in the dampening light.

"I'm not sad Lithay. Not for the people who have died below. I am sad for the loss of Dragons for the world."

"Ah. Toliver, I will not die in vain. This I promise." Her tail curled protectively around the egg that looked like blue veined marble. "Is the mixture ready?"

"It is Mistress. I have given all the Mathinike to it."

"All?" She almost roared.

"Yes, all."

"Toliver you understand I will not have enough Mathinike to transport you then?" She cast a worried look in his direction. "If you leave it out next to me, I will be able to use it and you can escape now."

"I will stay with you Mistress." He bowed his head in respect. He loved her and would die with her, if that was their fate. He looked at the trickle of blood that drained from where the arrow had pierced her. They had been unable to staunch the flow and it would only be a matter of time before her life force gave out.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Have child interrupting - nit picking time -- whoooohooooo....

Will finish in a moment.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

She nodded her head and looked at the old man. "Why have you never married Toliver?"

"Because you are the only thing worth loving Mistress." He said with his head still bowed.

"I thought as much. Well, what's done is done." She sighed. "How much longer?"

Toliver walked back to the opening. The small army was more than half way up the hill.

"Not much longer, Lithay."

"Come here." She ordered him.

He walked towards her and she enveloped him in her wings. She whispered in his ear and tears streamed down his face. He nodded and gathered the bowl and placed it in front of her.

"Toliver, my love for you is true. I will make this happen. You will help me care for my child and it will be as the Oracle divines." She looked at him, as he stroked her graceful neck. Her warm breath caressed his face.

Toliver could not speak past the lump in his throat. The divinity of his love had set her sacrifice and he would see it through. He would stand beside her and strengthen her as history played out. He would be there.

Lithay took the tip of her tail and dipped it into the mixture in the bowl. She touched the tip to Toliver's forehead and then to his heart. She dipped her tail again into the mixture and touched it to the egg, spreading the concoction around in a circular pattern. Her breathing becoming more and more ragged.

"Write it down Toliver, now." She demanded.

He raced to the table and put quill to paper, dipping it in ink every now and then. When he finished he glanced at Lithay, she was starting to wilt, the irridescence in her scales starting to dull. He hurriedly brushed sand across the paper to dry the ink.

"He will come soon - you will have about three minutes to tell him to take that scroll and then come to me." She whispered.

Toliver nodded and waited, the scroll sealed in a golden tube that also contained fifty gems of brilliant color and then placed inside a leather pack.

He could hear someone running towards the cavern. He stood his ground, believing in what the dragon had told him. A young boy, no more than fifteen came panting into the cavern, his clothes torn and his body blodied.

"Your Majesty!" He yelled, slumping to his knees on the floor.

"She is almost gone, young boy." Toliver said quietly.

"All is lost, " the young man looked at Toliver. "All is lost then. There is no hope."

"There is hope, if you but take this and run. Keep this with you and your family and pass it down through the centuries."

The lad looked at the old man as if he had gone crazy, but held out his hand.

"Is this what my Majesty commands?" He asked solemnly.

"It is as I command," Came the gasping reply from the dragon.

The boy bowed his head and took the tube, "Then it shall be." He knelt in front of the great dragon and lowered his head to her front claws, kissing them. The young boy stood up and ran from the cavern, carrying the leather pack.

The dragon's eyes smiled.

"It is time Toliver, come to me."

"Will he make it Lithay? Will all be well?" He asked as he strode towards his mistress.

"He will more than make it and his family and all the families that pass down, will do well and they will take care of my child when the time comes. It is as the Oracle said."

"I love you Lithay, and I believe you." He wrapped his tired arms around her neck and she nuzzled him and pulled the egg closer to them with her tail.

"And I you, Toliver." She rubbed her scaled cheek against him.

They both started chanting. The words mixing into a song. When she would falter, his voice carried louder, when she continued, he listened.

They waited until the sounds of the angry mob army was outside of the cavern and both of them continued chanting.

The egg shimmered and then dissappeared.

"It is done Toliver," She sighed, a smile lightened her eyes for a moment. "I thank you for giving my child a chance and for loving me."

"I live but to be there for you, Mistress."

He held her close until her last breath came and he held on to her even after the army came into the cavern.

"Where be the dragon of might and fear?" Mocked the Captain as he beheld the lifeless body of the dragon held on to by the old man.

"She has gone." Toliver answered simply.

"Aye, that she has." He sighted on the old man with his arrow. He pulled back on the string and let the arrow fly.

It flew straight into the heart of the man who loved Lithay, piercing him from behind. He died without a words, without the death throes the Captain had expected, even looked forward to.

He died with his arms still around his precious dragon's neck - he died with a smile on his face.

"And now, you too, are dead." The Captain mumbled, angry that there had been no more fanfare than what could have been had shooting at mice.

The army looted the cavern, finding treasure and precious items. But the one thing they did not find, was the egg.

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Chapter 1

Yep! It's official! I'm an idiot and now I'm on an idiot mission...

2006-03-18T02:10:00.000-09:00

*GRIN*

OK here's the scoop. On Anna Louise's journal I was asking a question... and in that question I tossed out a very made up example of a story that would use multiple genres ---- since the topic on her journal is about the importance of pinning down a genre (and a helluva a lot more.)

So this story I wrote to exemplify the question I had was ridiculously silly.

Well it's a story of a Dragon Egg that is teleported into the future where there is no magic. Yet, the Dragon that is born from the egg has magic. The Dragon befriends a human cop and helps the cop solve crimes (in the future) and the cop meets a lady... who the dragon uses a little bit of magic to make them fall in love.

It was an example of how a story could cross genres. OK yes - it was a really bad example... but whattya want? LMAO! I definetely didn't want to put out any of my own stories on her blog, as that would be rude...

But....

Something started tickling the back of my mind. Tickle... Tickle... Tickle. What if... What if I could actually make that short little paragraph into a story?

Now as you all know by now - I do a lot of "on demand" stories. I do shorts and I do full lengths. I do a lot of "On the Fly" style writing. I love contests and anything that has competition in it. I do requests and I do all sorts of stuff.

In other words. I freaking write.

And I'll be darned if I couldn't think of a reason to NOT make myself write something that I had created - even if it was stupid. But to instead, turn that stupidity into something that was actually reader friendly and good.

So - Here I will sit typing this story up to share with you. Give me up to one full day to process this moment of idiocy.

*Blinking red Light* Idiot Mission *Blinking red Light*

Alaska isn't Antartica

2006-03-17T01:40:00.000-09:00

Fine. I'll write about Alaska, twist my arm.

First, empty your mind of the images of frozen wasteland and penguins. Dismiss the blowing snow and igloos. Allow the preconceived notions of ice and mushing dogs to slide away.

Second you need to stop believing maps. Alaska is NOT below California on the left. It is not directly below Hawaii, either. Geographically, Alaska is on the left side of Canada. Got it?

OK now that we've got that in your mind, there are a few facts that I need to tell you:

Yes - we communicate with telephones, computers, email and regular snail mail. We have FedEx, UPS and all sorts of interesting things. We don't live in igloos. In fact I don't even think the native tribes still know how to build one.

No... I don't dogsled to work.

In pictures, I can tell you some things:

Anchorage - is a normal city. It has tall buildings, traffic and a bunch of crime - but it's also a helluva a lot of fun. Chilkoot's is the place to go if you want to go out - just watch out for the sawdust on the floor - and the bouncers. Malls, stores, car dealerships, bums... Just like any other downtown USA... And probably any other downtown around the world.

Now then, there are the outdoors. I have never seen such lovely places as there are in Alaska. Green, lush - almost tropical in the summer... Maybe not the same temperatures - but almost tropical... Or perhaps the word I am looking for is Rain Forrest.

Of course, there are lovely Aurora Borealis light shows every few days or weeks Wonderful light shows in the skies. They happen late fall and early winter - since there is a lot of sunlight in the summer and less sunlight in the winter. We have days when there are only 4 - 5 hours of sunlight during the day in winter. Pretty awesome if you ask me.

The dogs run in the summer and in the winter - and not everyone owns a set of them... And not every dog is a mushing dog --- Some people own pomeranians or poodles or dalmations... And they would never tie them up in a line. Lots of black labs... German Shepherds, etc. And kitties and birds and snakes... whatever your favorite pet is - a lot of the folks here have it.

To be honest - I only have to walk a block to see a view like this. Or drive a few miles to walk across trails. I'm not an avid outdoors freak - but I love seeing it from my own windows. This particular picture is from Afognak Island. Not too far from where I live. This picture was probably taken mid May or June. It's a State of Alaska Picture - and it is pretty representative of a lot of Alaska... Alaska anywhere during the summer.

There are a ton of waterfalls in Alaska. Just open your eyes. The island I live on has thousands of them in the summer. I love driving down the road and just stopping - amazed at the beauty of them... listening to them crash into life.

A view of the town where I live.... during the summer.

Yes. We do have winters - and yes, they are very long.

But Alaska is nothing like what most people think of... Blowing snow - penguins marching - igloos and dogsleds to work. (Ahem - I need to clarify - SOUTH POLE is where the penguins are...)

Any questions? Anything you want to know?

Like what are the flight times? LOL!

Lady M

My Writing Quote of the day...

2006-03-15T09:16:00.000-09:00

Sometimes quotes just pop into my head. And I have to put them down. The other day this one popped in - took a visit - and decided to stay.

I thought I'd share, before I forgot it.

"Writing is a wonderful moment in time, where the world finally comes into focus."

Some days were just meant to be hung over...

2006-03-15T08:58:00.000-09:00

Yeah one of those days.

I don't even know if my poor head can manage much more...

Scratching... Thinking... Pondering... Plotting...

And certainly no more wine. I'm so not a regular drinker. However, I will admit that last night it was a needed thing. At least the hubby thought so.

Good news - I didn't have a darn thing.

Bad news... My poor kid was infested.

Me - I was freaked out. Still am... Everything that goes bump makes me jump. But the kid - well she thought it was an adventure. Seriously, she was like, "way cool".

I'm thinking she's going to be a doctor. If she can handle this so well, she's got nerves of steel.

Still... I'm not sure if she was saying "way cool" about the critters - or about the way her mom freaked out.

LMAO!

Now that's too much pondering for my head.

Off with me to bed.

Savannah - woohoo - talk about YUMMY... So yummy that I can't even comment without uhm... well uhmmmmm.... yanno - right? LMAO!

Hot stuff girlie.

And Karl is rocking with the hilarity over at his site. Sheesh - I'm busting a gut and my head is pounding to the double beat of my laughter. You gotta see it to understand, but it's all about the potty. Oh yeah baby - get me excited. LMAO!

Alexandra had a birthday - woohoo! You go girl.

Jana Deleon has the cutest cover for her new sale. Remind me to fix her name over there on the link list - don't know why my fingers fumbled that one. I'm more excited about her cover than she is - it's way awesome! LOL!

And Jeff... Well he wrote a story about being a woman - and being an AVERAGE WOMAN... and let me tell you - it's quietly sweet, elegant, erotic and a darn good read.

Youse guys are wonderful writers - the whole lot of you. Each unique and extremely special.

There are more folks out there but with my head doing the "THUD THUD THUD" I just can't think clearly... Not that I ever did before.

Hugs to ya all!

OMG - Have you ever seen a head louse?

2006-03-13T22:48:00.000-09:00

This afternoon the school calls and says that my daughter's classroom has been singled out as an epidemic of head lice.

OMG OMG OMG OMG I think to myself. I've never seen it, never had it, don't have a clue about it.

My experience of head diseases stops at dandruff.

So here we go searching, because who knows, there might be something there. Adventurerama right?

Wrong. How very freaking wrong.

Daughter gets sat down and I take out a comb, and gently pull apart her hairs and AHA!

There - in front of me are speckles of white. They shift, they move -and panicked that I am, I scream for the husband to come over. He hmmms... He hmpppffffs... He nudges a few hairs over and starts picking through her hair while I sit there freaking out.

BUUUUUUUUUUUUUGS.

Finally he stands back and he says, "That's not lice, that's dandruff."

I breathe the deepest sigh of relief. I am instantly calm. The man of the house has spoken - life is good.

And then he smiles and he pulls her hair apart and snags something. Me, I think he's joking around. He turns and grabs a sandwich bag, opens it up, slips his hand in, pulls his hand out and zips it up tight...

He hands the bag to me and says proudly: "Now that's a lice."

He woke me up from the floor. There are few things that really bother me - not quite phobias, but extreme dislikes. BUGS are one of them. Lice are BUGS.

He's laughing at me - I'm freaking out.

Profoundly.

I'm thinking about all the things we'll have to cancel. How we can avoid telling anyone - will we have to give up our membership at the country club? Oh we're scourge! We're horrible people. I knew I should have vacuumed twice a day. I knew I shouldn't have worn those pants twice, I didn't think anyone would notice - honest.

Suddenly the world tunneled in on me.

He's laughing at me still...

I'm thinking - my mind is whirling and then - the most amazing thing happened. Every BIT of my skin started crawling. I had the itchies. Everything everywhere felt like it was being tickled... And I'm freaking out even more.

Hubby dearest realizes I'm about to explode in a freak out session of mass proportions because he knows that I'm almost bug-o-phobic - I'm almost in hysterics.

Me... A person who has held dying people gooping blood out and pieces of bodies... Me... the one who has assisted with airplane casualties... Me... the one who has picked up decapitated heads... I'm seriously a basket case when it comes to the thought of little critters crawling around on my skull.

I won't even let him check my head, because I don't want to know for sure I've got them. Nope. Not going to be there if I don't know for sure.

He's laughing his ass off - still. He carefully turns to the fridge and pulls out a bottle of wine, and pours me a glass - which I down in five seconds holding it out for refills. A few glasses later, I'm coherent and able to think straight.

I start military strategy. I write down with efficiency the things we will obviously need:

A kit of removal for every person. A trenchcoat and hat with sunglasses for the person buying the kits, a complete plastic tarp... a flame thrower - a new tent to live in with sleeping bags.

I hand the list to the husband because I am OBVIOUSLY not going to be the one to go to the store. He gently removes the pen from my hand and marks off everything except the kits.

He valiantly agrees to go to the store.

(Of course, I had a steak knife in my hand thinking about how I could skewer any that might jump into the air...)

I don't even have to argue.

For my protection, he takes the child with him.

Me, I'm standing in the middle of the kitchen, afraid to move in any direction, knife in hand, waiting for something small and brown to come out of the sandwich bag that I haven't looked at or touched since he handed it to me in a moment of his bad judgement.

I know that when it comes out, it will be something the size of a pit bull. It will have massive chompers and it will violently twist my head in it's claws as it drains my lifeblood from my head.

Oh yeah, baby, I'm not afraid of bugs. I just can't stand them.

Hubby and kid come home in gales of laughter. I'm still in the kitchen. I've given up on my vigilance with the knife. I'm coming to terms with the fact that I might have some guests visiting me - at least until I can rip open the boxes of shampoo.

I glop the shampoo on all of us - we wait the expected 10 minutes. We all start the combing process.

I tell them - Don't even think about telling me what you find in my hair, as I pick a few nits out of my daughter's hair. Little dandruff looking things - yeah sure... Dandruff...

I keep telling myself that nothing is going to pull an Alien on my hands and start chomping with ravenous teeth.

So that part is done.

He wouldn't get me the flame throwers so I guess I can't torch the house. I've sprayed every surface that is imaginable. I've vacuumed, I've wiped, I've combed, I've washed...

I have so much more to do. He won't let me use bleach either. Sigh... He just doesn't understand...

So here I sit, after a bottle and a half of wine (I'm a very very light drinker - so I'm trashed ahoy!)... I've finally gotten the nerve to see the little prisoner he caught and put in the bag. I put it up against the light...

I look and it waves at me with all of it's legs - and this immense guilt comes over me as I realize I just wiped out his whole world... I've just demolished his forrests of splendor and his families of love...

Ah well. Too bad...

Die sucker! I'm saving you so I can give you to the school nurse.

You know... There are a couple of people I wouldn't mind dumping this on... Just casually open the bag near their heads and shake...

Ahhh... that's right. I'm a nice person...

Argggghhh... Work in 3 hours and Blogspot keeps going down.

2006-03-12T11:48:00.000-09:00

OK - guys - I'm sorry that the site is going to have to stay like this for a day or two.

I promise I will try to fix it tonight, but I'm exhausted, fighting with Blogspot for the last 5 hours. It keeps crashing right in the middle of an HTML write - and I'm going nuts about it.

Anyhow - I'll fix it. Some of the colors are annoying me. And The links don't want to go where I want them - but not bad for just one night's work.

Bear with me. LOL!

Lady M

I just realized... Same blog template as Emeraldcite...

2006-03-11T23:31:00.000-09:00

OK - I'm on the blog template hunt again.

Gots to find me sumthin' difrant.

Gots to get creeatuv.

Emeraldcite's blog is nice - go visit him - while I look for something to make my pages stand out and look interesting.

Shhhhhh.... be vewwwy vewwwwy qwwiiwiit. We are huntwing blog templates. *g*

Eeeeeevil... Just Eeeeeeevil... Pinkie to mouth

2006-03-11T20:47:00.000-09:00

On the fly - story about evil... Slithering, insiduous evil.

I'm at work, so forgive any errors. Again, as I've said before, I don't plan On the Fly work out. I just write and let whatever wants to come out - out. Like an exorcism.

It Wasn't Me
By Lady M

I'd been saying it all morning and I don't know why one more time would be the one that broke the camel's back... it just did.

"Taylor, maybe you should just quiet down and let Mommy work." I said for about the fifteenth time.

"Bang! I got you Mommy!" He pointed his gun at me again and ran around me in a screaming rendition of cowboys and indians. "Bang! Bang! Bang!"

"Taylor honey, could you please take your gun and go into the playroom? Mommy really has to finish writing this contract." I rubbed my bleary eyes, trying to make them uncross.

"No." It sounded like he had spit it out.

I stopped rubbing my eyes and turned to look at my son. He'd never said the word "no" so vehemently before and I was in no mood to put up with it this time.

"Taylor Jacob Anderson!" I admonished him.

"I said No!" His voice roise and his little face turned fire engine red.

"I told you to go into the other room. Now march mister before I give you a reason to be sorry." It usually worked, the small threats. I never spanked him, but he was terrified of them, so usually it worked. I pointed my finger in the direction of his play room where every toy ever made by mankind was scattered all over the floor.

I glanced up at the clock and noticed it was almost ten o'clock in the morning. Another half an hour and the babysitter would show up, relieving me of my parental duties so I could rush off to the noon meeting with all of the bigwigs I had prepared the presentation for.

It had to be perfect - the presentation... It just had to be. The art on the portfolio would either make or break my career today. The cars depicted on the first drawing would hopefully bring me and my family a hundred grand of much needed money. I had gone into debt just keeping my art skills up and learning to write contracts. I had freelanced long enough and now I needed to get noticed or quit and find a decent day job. We were down to our last few hundred in the bank, so this was make it or break it time.

Taylor stood there glaring at me and my pointing finger. Not moving, not budging.

"I said move it Taylor, right this instant, I'm not kidding."

"I hate you!" He screamed at me, anger and ferocity etched in his face, his little green eyes bulging.

I sat back as his tirade freaked me out for a second. What the hell was going on with my perfect angel son?

I wasn't prepared when he leapt onto me, kicking and biting. His teeth found purchase on my cheek, ripping into the flesh. For a moment, I just sat there, dazed and a little confused and then I grabbed his shoulders and pushed him away from me. Bad mistake, I suppose now, but at the time it wasn't a concious thought, it was a reaction.

His mouth came away from my face, with a chunk of flesh in it. I could feel the warmth of the blood dripping down my jawline and down my neck. It splattered onto the floor.

Time stood still as I watched my son carefully and purposefully chew on my skin between his teeth. He was enjoying the taste of my meat.

Dazed, I reached over and slapped him across the face, dislodging the contents of his mouth onto the floor. I held my hand to my cheek and realized that I now had a chunk missing and that piece now lay quivering right there in front of me on the dirty floor.

Shock made me sit back down and kept me holding on to my cheek to keep the blood from oozing out in gushes of vibrant red.

I stared at my son trying to make sense of what had just happened. All thoughts of the meeting far from my mind.

He stood there, his fists clenching and unclenching, his eyes swirling in chaos and his jaw tight. His eyes narrowed and for a moment I feared another attack, I jerked backwards in fright.

That was a mistake, his eyes narrowed and his mouth turned upwards in a satisfied smile.

"What the hell did you just do that for?" I tried to keep my voice calm, trying to sort this all out as blood slid through my fingers.

"Because I hate you Mommy. I want to see you bleed and die." He said calmly, watching me for a reaction.

My five year old was telling me he wanted me to die! What the fuck was going on?

Before I could think of what I was going to do to staunch the blood flow or how I was going to handle Taylor - he closed the distance and grabbed my hair, tearing out a chunk of it, as I stood and yanked my head away.

He kept coming at me, swinging his hands like claws. He was chomping his mouth, the sound of his teeth clacking as he tried to bite down on my arm or my side, it didn't matter where his teeth found purchase, he just wanted them to close down on my body, anywhere.

I backed up towards the hallway trying to stay out of his reach. Panicked, I tried to think of where to go.

The downstairs bathroom! If I could get to the bathroom, I would be able to lock the doors and crawl out the window. Then I could get help. First for my son and then for my bleeding face.

"Don't move Mommy, I'm going to get you," he growled in a low rumbling voice.

At the top of the stairs, ready to take the first step, he jumped onto my back, taking a chunk of my hair in his hands - he slammed his teeth down onto my shoulder and bit all the way through.

I slammed my body backwards against the wall, blood started oozing down my arm and back and another chunk of flesh was missing from my body.

I'm not sure exactly what happened then. It's kind of hazy. The next thing I know, we were both lying on the floor at the bottom of the stairs. I scrambled to my feet and the blood flowed down into a pool at my feet.

Taylor was lying there, not moving. His head and neck were bent at an impossible angle. I could see him still breathing, but his body wasn't trying to get up. My son was laying there and I was terrified to go and make sure he was going to be all right.

I knelt next to him and I didn't know what to do. A wave of hopelessness washed over me. I reached down to see if there was anything I could feel that was broken.

"Taylor. Oh my god Taylor. What just happened?" I was afraid to pick him up or touch him, I worried that I might damage or kill him.

I looked into his eyes and noted they were clear and not hazed over, he smiled up at me. I looked at his neck, obviously angled in a way that necks were never meant to be angled.

"Mommy," he said, trying to get my attention that was diverted to his neck.

"Hold on Taylor, I'm going to get you to the doctor." I pleaded with god, with the devil, anything to make my baby come back to me. It was hopeless and I knew it, but I still wanted him to be fine.

"Mommy..." He said again, making sure I was looking into his eyes. "I love you Mommy."

"Oh god, Taylor, I love you too, honey, everything is going to be ok." I desperately looked for anything that would help, I stood up to go grab the phone and dial 9-1-1. "Just hold on baby."

His nails clutched my pantleg and pulled me down to him. I knew it was useless to try and save him, his breathing was already becoming ragged and red frothy foam was coming out of his nose.

"Mommy, it wasn't me." That was all he said.

The light dimmed out of his eyes and I knew right then that he was gone. There was nothing I could do to bring him back. I grabbed his lifeless body and pressed him close to me, covering him in kisses.

"It wasn't me," echoed through my mind as we waited for someone to find us.

To Technorati or Not? Any Blog Templates out there?

2006-03-11T08:12:00.000-09:00

I've asked Karl E if it is something that will work with blogspot.

I know nothing about it - and am interested in it... (I looked at the website - I get the basic idea - have heard a lot about it... but alas... my eyes are glazing over after trying to build this darn site up...)

I don't think it will ever be as visually stunning as Tanya's site but one could hope for a little beauty in this world.

I just want mine to be a little different than others... My own personal touch...

So if ANY of you know how to change Blogspot around and personalize it ---- or you have links to how to make a template for it --- I'm all ears!

Lady M

Changing the landscape still... Hold on to your hats!

2006-03-11T07:21:00.000-09:00

It's a slow process, trying to figure out what fits where.

I'm not entirely happy with the colors of the blog template, I'm going to try and change them around a bit.

And wahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! I lost my links to the sites on the right - I'll have to remake those as soon as I get settled with what I like.

Hugs to all!

My dragon likes you - btw.

I'm working on the blog... Watch where you step...

2006-03-11T06:45:00.000-09:00

You might step in something squishy. LOL!

On the Fly and Ellipsis Queen...

2006-03-11T02:32:00.000-09:00

What is on the fly?

Well... let me tell you.

It's writing and just writing with whatever is on your mind. No planning other than a basic idea. No character draw ups.

No real plot in mind other than A meets B. A falls in love with B. A and B live happily ever after.

Or... Saving the world, saving someone - helping out this organization, etc.

Just the basic idea.

The plot and characters develop as you write - the words create them. The mood makes them happen. The feelings become the story. The ideas flow and become real as you paint them on the canvas of the screen.

Each typed letter brings you closer to the end, even if you have no specific end in mind.

Some people need to plan their stories. Some people need to have creative free-flowing thought. Some people need to have structure to make their stories come alive.

Me - I like to let the story enter my body and take over. Nothing else matters but seeing where they end up. The writing is part of the journey to find out.

Like an exorcism of a spirit - the words bleed out onto the paper or the screen and allow the thoughts to explode into being.

Now... as far as the ellipsis thingie... I love them. They are a pause between thoughts, a carry on - like the sentence isn't finished... or a way to keep the idea going through several sentences.

I love them because they give pause where a real conversation would have it. They trail off like comets streaking across the sky, only to flare brilliantly again to show a pause of thought.

Yeah, like my thoughts are brilliant - ROFLMAO - uh huh. Sure thing.

Where's the white jacket that has all those pretty buckles in the back?

Erotica on the fly... OVER 18 ONLY!

2006-03-10T06:57:00.000-09:00

If you're not over 18 - step away from the computer!

I'm about to get down and dirty. Nasty, sexually explicit...

You know... Just this short of porn. Ok so it IS porn... But hey... Just tell me if it's believable - eh?

I visited Tanya's site tonight, where the topic of sexual ability in your characters was discussed.

In this story on the fly - I am going to try and capture the "young, awkward" feeling of a first time encounter. The characters will be about 21 or 22. College aged. I dunno what's gonna happen, so you'll have to take a ride with me and my imagination.

I'll set up the scene and then just let it ride with whatever happens. I want to focus on character spotlight/thinking - bouncing from each other, seeing simultaneously both points of view.

Without further ado - enter my voluptuous lair and grab a towel while you're at it. (*grin*)

The Math Bounce
(Story of Erotica - by Lady M)

The doorbell rang and even though she was expecting him to show up to help her with mid-terms, butterflies fluttered through her stomach.

Jessa hardly knew anything about Mark. Except that every time she'd looked at him, he'd been watching her from behind his wire frame lenses. Nice blue eyes and a patrician nose made him not so geeky looking, but more refined, more intelligent somehow. And now, here he, the king of the math class, was coming to help her with studies. He was the only reason she had joined math class in the first place. But now that she was in it, she had to keep up, or she'd never get a chance to get to know him.

She jumped up to answer the door, almost knocking over a glass of water that she'd sat on the table in front of her. She absently tucked her red hair behind her ear as she pulled open the door.

He stood there, looking at her. Calm and almost detached. It made the butterflies turn into a nest of raving hornets and her chest tightened as she realized that he was exceptional to look at. The other girls tended to stay away from him - his shy smile and glasses making him appear to be less than what Jessa thought of him... Like Clark Kent, she mused to herself.

"Hey Jessa." He said as he came in through the opened door. "You ready for me, or am I too early?"

"Not at all." Breathe, keep thinking about math... Don't blush.

"Cool." Mark sat his backpack on her studio's coffee table, and looked around, taking the place in.

"Would you care for anything to drink?"

"Sure, got a Soda?"

"I'm the Queen of Doctor Pepper - will that do?"

His lips curled up slightly as he smiled and nodded. Jessa turned towards the small studio apartment's kitchen and opened the refrigerator, pulling out one of the maroon cans. She turned and held it out to him after she popped the top.

"Would you like a glass or anything?" She asked and her hand brushed his, causing an electric spark and a rush of warmth to travel through her.

"Nah, this will be fine. Thanks."

"Anytime."

"You ready to study now?" He reached for his backpack

She moved over to the futon mattress that served as the studio's couch when it was folded up and patted the space next to her after she sat down.

"Sure, why not. Math's the thing."

"Yeah, I can tell you like the math - especially the way you yawn through the professor's class." He smiled at her.

"Hey now!" Damn, was he cute, or what? Teasing her like that.

Mark opened up the books and pulled out a pencil and a yellow notepad.

Jessa reached over to an end table and put her books and pencil in front of her.

"So what do you do for fun?" She asked, while she was setting up.

"I don't know. I kinda like to make graphic art. That's what I want to do, you know? I want to make graphic art for advertising. But I want to freelance."

"Awesome dude." She lifted an eyebrow to show she was impressed. "Well, I guess I'm as ready as I'm going to get. Show me Einstein." She watched his profile as his mouth corners turned up on the sides and a blush tinted his cheeks. He was pretty darn cute, with or without the glasses.

"Yeah. O.k.," he paused, pointing to the equation. "This is an imaginary number. Your job is to figure out what number it is in order to solve the problem."

"Like I'm going to be able to figure it out."

"You will, trust me."

"Yeah, you wanna put some money on it?"

"Erm.." He grinned, "I dunno if you're worth that kind of money."

Jessa picked up one of the throw pillows on the futon and hit him gently with it.

"Yeah. Ok. Now... Back to the lesson - here's what you do with this number." He explained.

For the next hour, he walked her through the math book. He tried keeping her laughing, so that she would remain interested. There was an easy companionable feeling working together.

When he saw that her attention span had dropped, Mark decided he needed to give her a break.
"So what do you do for fun?" He asked, settling back as comfortable as he could on the futon couch waiting on her answer, as she stood up to go get them some more sodas.

He was so fine. Jessa wasn't sure whether pheromones were racing through the air or if she had just started a school girl crush. It didn't matter, she was going to seduce him. Maybe not tonight, but some day soon. There was something about him that set her body on fire, leaving her breathless for more than the accidental contact when handing him the soda.

"I like to kiss," She blurted out embarrasing herself.

"Ah." He said, hanging his head to hide his own blush.

"I mean... I mean.... that's not what I meant, it just sort of popped out."

"Uh huh."

Great he wasn't going to help her out of this hole. Jessa stood there trying to not freak out that she'd said exactly what was on her mind.

"I meant that I like hanging out with you."

"You mean you don't want to kiss me?" He teased her while he watched her from the futon couch.

"Oh I don't know, I mean you'd be fine to kiss, but that's not what I meant." She sputtered.

Looking brave, he stood up to face her. "Well I'd like to kiss you."

"You would?" She gulped out. Fine, she wouldn't have to seduce him, he was going to seduce her. Fine with her.

He nodded and looked at her through his lenses, she noticed that his eyelashes touched the inside as he blinked. His eyes were a soft, deep blue. She could fall through them.

"I've only kissed one other girl. When we were kids." He looked away and put his hands in his pockets.

That stopped her cold. One girl? Say what? Was he gay?

"Seriously?" She asked him.

"Yeah."

"Why? You're a good looking guy. And I mean it." She poked him in the chest to make her point.

"It's a long story."

"Well... tell me." Curiosity piqued, she sat back on the couch and leaned forward to show her ineterest, elbows on her knees and her hands folded under her chin.

Mark sat back down. This time at an almost uncomfortable distance from Jessa.

"You really want to hear about it?" He glanced over at her.

"Yeah, I do."

"Well... I had a girlfriend and we were pretty serious for about 6 years. We started hanging out when we were just little kids."

"Go on."

"Well. She was in this church and she had to go on her mission. I waited for her." He unconciously clenched his jaw. Jessa noted that he looked heartbroken and something in her started aching for him. "For 2 years."

"Did she come home?" She prompted.

"Yeah, she came home, but immediately left afterwards."

"Where'd she go?" Again, more curiosity.

"She went to go marry this other guy she'd met on her mission. Said that she needed to have someone in her life that was in the church. And as much as she loved me, it wasn't good enough for her that I had been born out of the church." He looked down and cleared his throat.

"Ah. I'm really sorry about that." She reached out and touched his arm. "How long ago was it?"

"Two years ago - that she got married." He looked at her hand on his arm and made to reach for it, but only lightly brushed his fingertips across the back of her hand, before setting his own hand back down on the futon, unsure of what to do.

Oh my God, Jessa thought, was he a virgin? But when his hand had touched hers, a warmth had traveled up her arm.

"Have you dated anyone else since then?" She reached up and brushed a stray strand out of his face so that she could see his eyes. She noticed that he smelled wonderful. Yummy. Like some sort of musky pine fragrance. It was mouth watering.

"I just never really had a chance to. I didn't really feel like meeting anyone else for awhile and then... well I just haven't met anyone that I wanted to ask out," He looked into her eyes, "until I met you, that is."

Oh, how sweet. Her heart was melting. She'd never slept with a virgin before, she wondered if there was anything she was supposed to do to make it important enough for him. Was it the same thing for a guy as it was for a girl?

Instead of saying anything, she leaned into him and put her hands on his face, making him look directly at her. She slowly lowered her mouth to him and gently set her lips on his.

Mark's first reaction was to tense up and hold his breath. So many thoughts ran through his mind. She's beautiful. She's touching me. She's kissing me. How do I kiss her? Should I touch her. I want this to be just right. He closed his eyes. The feelings overwhelmed him.

Jessa watched him close his eyes, and cupped his chin gently.

"No. I want you to look at me," she told him. "I want you to see me kissing you."

A small sigh escaped from him. This was it then. He hoped that he had decent breath and that he could perform well enough in this kiss. He certainly had never had enough practice.

"Now, kiss me back... gently... " She instructed.

His heart was racing as he felt her hands move to his hair and he watched her lean in to kiss him again. When her lips touched his, they felt silky and soft and tasted like the soda. Part of him wanted to overtake her, to plunge his mouth onto hers and keep them connected in a primal way. Except she was the one in control and he wanted to make her happy.

Her tongue flickered out and slid across his bottom lip, and he opened his mouth to let her have access. He looked into her eyes, but kept his hands at his sides. He was terrified and more excited than he had ever been before.

"You've really never done this," she leaned back. Amazed that someone as good looking as Mark didn't even know how to kiss.

"Is it that bad?" A shadow of worry crossed his face.

"I think it's wonderful! Move." She made him sit in the middle of the futon. "Now lean back."

He looked at her as she stood up and watched as she moved to stand in front of him. She reached for his hands and kneeled down in front of him, while holding his hands.

"Ok. This is a little backwards for me." Jessa looked up at Mark. "But I think it's way cool that you want me to be the one. So I'm going to teach you the right way to do stuff, ok? You have got to totally trust me. Can you do that?"

"Yeah," he smiled at her. "I can do that."

"O.k. now lean back and just relax. You'll know what to do if you just follow my lead."

He nodded and leaned back. He trusted her. Something about her made him feel like he had come home after a century of traveling in a parched desert.

She brought up one of his hands to her mouth. She breathed warm breath across the back of his knuckles and then licked them gently. She heard him moan in the back of his throat. Damn, she was turned on by just watching his reactions.

She took his hand and rubbed her face on it, letting his finger tips trail across her lips. She pulled his index finger into her mouth, sucking on it, letting her tongue twirl around and feel the ridges on the tips of his fingers.

"That feels wonderful," he whispered to the air.

Jessa got off of her knees and then straddled his lap. For a moment all she did was look at him as if she were memorizing every feature on his face. And then she leaned forward and put her finger tips to his mouth.

"Now you do it," she told him.

Mark reached up and held her hand, he kissed each one of her fingertips as she nodded, giving him permission to go on. He closed his mouth over her thumb and looked in her eyes as he copied what she had done earlier to his hand.

She could feel his hardness underneath her, so she tried to make sure he wasn't uncomfortable and tried to keep some pressure off of him. She was so aware of how he felt underneath her - and she almost moaned out loud when he gently scraped his teeth across her thumb.

"Improvising is good." She said. Absolutely great.

He nodded and then reached up to touch her long red hair. He pulled on it gently to bring her closer to him. He wasn't sure what he was going to do, once she was that close, but it was a need he had to fulfill. He needed her closer to him - like he needed to mesh her inside of him somehow.

She moved with him as he pulled her closer brushing her cheek against his. Savoring the way his clean shaven face felt against hers. Like a cat, she rubbed her cheek into him, arching her back just enough to angle her body so that she could make her lips meet his again.

Her hair tickled his face and he felt her lips on his again. He had to close his eyes so that he could enjoy the sensation overload. Part of him wanted more than this. Yet, part of him relished this slow sensual dance she was doing to him.

This time, when she kissed him, she used her fingertips with her tongue in his mouth and she touched the tip of her tongue to his. He felt electrified. He felt connected and he wanted to make her more than just a friend. He wanted her to be a part of him forever at that moment. It felt right and his chest grew even tighter at this new feeling.

She trailed her mouth from the kiss to his neck and he moaned as she swiped her tongue across his jugular vein and up to his earlobe. Gentle butterfly kisses, he thought. He reached up to touch her face and pulled her head closer to his neck. God he wanted more of this.

Jessa pulled gently away, amazed that she was so in tune with him already after just a few kisses. She looked down at him and noticed his lips were red and swollen and his breathing was more rapid. What a freaking turn on - why hadn't she ever taught anyone else before?

"So what did you think of that kiss?" She asked.

"It was one of the most beautiful things on this earth." He looked up at her. He reached for her hand and enclosed her delicate hand in his larger one. Touching her. It was like being in Heaven.
"Yeah? You really liked it?"

"Yeah. I loved it."

"Wanna try some more?" She squirmed a little in order to keep his interest, but it was an unnecessary movement - he was rock hard underneath her.

"I... want more. I want everything you're willing to give."

"Everything?" An impish light came on in her eyes. She traced his jawline with her fingertip and slid it slowly to his collar. She unbuttoned it as he watched her, curious to see where she would go.

"Yeah..."

She unbuttoned the second button and then the third, all the way down to the top of his jeans. She leaned forward and kissed his neck, trailing her tongue down his chest. His breath quickened again and she could tell that he wanted more.

She kissed his lips again with a little more force. He reached up and held her head this time, pulling her into him as if he was desperate to drink every last drop of her. The tip of her fingernail found his nipple and gently flicked it. A sharp intake of breath let her know that this was a turn on for him.

So she pulled her lips away from his and put her mouth just above his nipple, she flicked her tongue over the small nub and then lightly scraped it with her teeth.

"Oh my god. I never... I didn't think. Oh my..." he trailed off, giving in to sensations he'd never experienced before.

She sat back up straight and watched him, his eyes were dilated and she wanted to undress him fully, but she also wanted his hands on her.

She pulled her shirt off over her head and took off her bra and his eyes got wider as he took in her breasts with his eyes.

Mark wondered if he could die of happiness. He looked at her breasts in front of him. Beautiful, round and perfect looking with darker circles surrounding the soft nipples - he wanted to touch them. He watched her for a reaction as he reached up to feel her soft skin. She arched her back when he held one of them in his hands. His thumb stroked the nipple and he watched, amazed as it swelled up and tightened under his thumb. His groin tightened in response.

"I want to taste you, like you did to me."

Jessa nodded and slid off of him, an almost painful loss of warmth leaving his comfortable body. She laid down on her back and held her hand out to him so he could follow her. To let him know that it was ok for him to be on top of her. She spread her legs so that he could fit in between them. Jessa wanted to feel his hard cock pressing up against her again. She wanted to feel him grind up against her.

She was already wet, and this was just getting better. She watched as he took both nipples in his fingers. Fascinated and amazed, he touched them and her back involuntarily arched again as he tenderly stroked.

He leaned down and slipped his tongue around one of the nipples.

"Suck on it," she prompted him.

He placed his lips around the nipple and when he sucked she almost screamed in delight.

She pushed her pelvis into his and bumped up against him, pressing harder as he sucked on her nipple. He responded by rocking back and forth with her in a dance as old as nature.

Jessa put her hand in between them and reached for his jeans top button. He continued to lick and suck on her nipples like he was eating candy and she was ready for more. When she reached the top button, she could feel the head of his cock at the top of the jeans. He hand found it slightly wet and she used her index finger to swirl around the wetness at the tip.

He stiffened when she touched him. Not wanting to lose the moment but being overwhelmed at having someone else's hands touch him. His hands on her breast squeezed hard and she liked it, reaching into his jeans to cup the head and stroke it and undoing the rest of his jeans. When she was done opening the jeans, his shaft sprang out and she was amazed at how beautiful it looked. Sleek and strong and hard.

"Now do that to me," She panted in his ear.

He fumblingly pulled at the top of her jeans. Nope. She wasn't going to wait that long, she reached down and pulled her jeans down, making him move to accomodate her, she left her underwear on.

He looked down on her. What a perfect body she had. She looked gorgeous in a dark blue satin pair of panties. He looked in her eyes and noticed that her face was flushed. He lingered looking at her so that she had to stop and focus on him.

"I want you to know that this is incredible Jessa, but I don't want to do anything you would regret." He looked at her tenderly.

"The only thing I'm going to regret is if you don't make love to me now."

"I just wanted to make sure. I've wanted you since I met you, but I didn't think you'd be interested."

(((((((THE KID IS JUMPING UP AND DOWN AND DEMANDING BREAKFAST RIGHT NOW AND THE HUBBY JUST TURNED ON SPORTS ON TV>>> AND NOW THE KID HAS SOME COMPUTER GAME SCHOOL TYCOON WITH ALL OF THESE SIRENS AND ALARMS... DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW HARD IT IS TO WRITE EROTICA WITH A CONVERSATION ABOUT BARRY BONDS AND BACON????? - JUST THOUGHT I"D SHARE - LOL!))))))

"Well, I am and I was since last semester, but I didn't know how to ask you."

"Ah" a satisfied smile crossed his face. "I don't have any protection - I wasn't planning on this."

How refreshing.

A man who hadn't been thinking he was going to get laid. He actually just liked her. Not that he didn't find her attractive but more that he wanted to get to know her for who she was. For some reason, these thoughts made her want to hold him close to her and just stay cuddled with him. But her body wouldn't let her. Her body ached to have him inside of her... And maybe, he was the one. He sure felt like the one at the moment, laying on top of her, pressing up against her crotch with his glorious cock.

"I have some in my purse - we'll worry about that part in a moment - if you last, that is..." She grinned up at him.

He grinned right back, "I may be inexperienced with some things, but I think I can hold out long enough."

"Alright, touch me then." She took his hand and placed it on her body, leading it ever downward to the space between her legs. She almost came when he gently stroked over her clit with his hand, timid, yet eager to touch her.

He slid his finger underneath the elastic of the underwear and she closed her eyes in bliss as his fingers found her wet spot and slid around, feeling her respond to him. She rode his finger, telling him with her body where to touch and how much pressure. He learned fast and he read her response like he was made for her. Like they were of the same mind.

Their breathing quickened as they stroked each other. They kissed and experienced the moment. He continued to fondle her amazed at the beauty of her body and her reactions. He could tell that this was exciting her and knowing he had this kind of power of a woman set him on the edge of no return.

Jessa reached above her head to grab her purse, she pulled out a condom. She ripped open the wrapper and in one swift move rolled it over his cock.

"I want you to put it in me now." She ordered him.

He reached down and kissed her. He wanted her to know that this was far more than just sex to him, this was something more incredible than that - a sharing of minds and body. His lips were tenderly brushing hers as he slowly entered her. He was afraid she would break until she started responding by grinding up into him. Positioning herself onto his shaft, she pumped with her body, up and down, undulating her hips.

He held her close and met her rythym. Lost on a sea, with no shore in sight, he rocked with her until she started whimpering against his mouth. He felt her contract around him and she held her breath - he couldn't stop himself as he emptied himself into her.

Together they lay there, holding each other. Both thinking that this was something more than just a moment. He tenderly brushed a hair off her face that had found it's way into her mouth.

"You're beautiful." He said.

"You're amazing, Can we do this again?" Jessa looked up at him.

"The way I feel right now," he leaned down and kissed her, "I could stay here forever."

"I might just hold you to that." She grinned.

"Well as long as you learn your math." He teased.

"You do realize," she looked at him, a little embarrassed to tell him the truth. "That the only reason why I took that class is so I could sit next to you and see you?"

"You're kidding me." He smiled.

"No. Actually I'm not."

"Well, then, how do you find math now?"

"Bouncy." She laughed.

He nestled his face in her hair and decided that sometimes, you just know.

TAAAAAAAAAAAADAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH.....

I so hate Sports right now... Ruined a perfectly good Erotica moment. SIGH.

LMAO - Well - I don't know if this is supposed to be on the blog - but it's been going up and down... So we'll see how it does... (THE BLOG IS GOING UP AND DOWN - SILLY),

I've got to hit the hay - so if it won't come out today, I'll post it tonight when I get up. Also - if you like or hate it - let me know...

It's pretty graphic - and I'm refusing to go back in and fix any typos... I wrote this in the BLOG create post area and it's having some problems... Like backspacing ell suckos because it's not always connecting... LOL!

OK - so see ya.

Hugs to y'all.

Lady M
Porn Queen... LMAO

The Wind doth Call...

2006-03-08T03:22:00.000-09:00

I always say I'm going to talk about Alaska some day.

Today I will sort of broach the subject. But I want to talk about the wind.

The wind is howling, it's voice dark and eerie - making the house shudder and the windows breathe in and out as it applies icy claws to them.

The sound it makes is reminescent of a speeding train and the voice of demons. I watch it whip tornadoes of snow into blinding blizzards that rush into the trees to try to rip the limbs from their bodies. Thrashing, angry and violent - like a mad man slamming through the very air I breathe.

It is spellbinding to listen to. It is amazing to watch. It is scary on a certain level because you know, that it could destroy you, if it only gained a little more speed.

As I sit here and type, I look out the window and it is dark except for this streetlight that paves the road's curve by our almost isolated house. I see the eddies of turbulence and as I watch, it folds endlessly upon itself, like shrieking phantoms.

Part of me wants to cower under the bed, shivering with fear of this incredible force of nature.

But part of me wants to open up to the chaos.

I would love to be the wind.

To torment everyone with my slithering whispers. To shake their homes and blow through their rooftops. Like an evil troll who is happy at his game of fear, I would love to watch those who view me cower.

I would love to lift debris and throw it across the way and dump over cannisters like a thug running down the street. I would love to toss the boats around making them slam against the waves with a "whoosh" that would seem insignificant to the demonic howls I could produce.

So I sit here and watch the wind and let the goosebumps rise as I rub my arms and hold myself to make sure I am still whole.

Like phantoms they are swirling faster - like a dream that has been ripped asunder - I watch the wind.

Miss Snark has no more comments... Sad...

2006-03-06T20:31:00.000-09:00

Sniffle.

I don't know what happened, but I am saddened that the comment sections are now missing from Miss Snark's blog.

I hope that they come back soon - that maybe... just maybe... they are a BLOGSPOT issue and it's not a personal choice.

Oh pleaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaase.........

If you haven't checked out this blog - get your waterproof chair

2006-03-06T05:57:00.000-09:00

Oh my goodness!

I haven't laughed so hard in such a long time.

Tonight I went a'blog hopping. You know - where you just start reading blogs that you may have seen somewhere or that were linked on someone else's site. And there were two out there tonight, that were extremely funny.

One was pretty rootin' tootin' funny.

I read a few posts and laughed at the similar style and feeling over all of another blogger. I was amused. I'll even give you the link:

http://savannahjordan.blogspot.com/

It's a pretty decent read, too. Good flowing style, keeps your interest.

But... The KING of blogs that I read tonight... The one that made me grab my sides to make sure they weren't splitting - oh sheesh - it was so hilarious, I read through just about every single post on the site!

I think I just found GOD. Or the love of my life - as long as I didn't have to meet him!

ROFLMAO!

http://agentsoutlook.blogspot.com/

Now, you truly have to be able to handle a swear word or two... or a million. And that "jaded" feeling is so alive - hopped up on caffeine and filled with fiendishness.

But the honest, just throw it in your face style is something my dreams are made from. I love extreme wit. I also love dark humor and sarcasm.

This blog DELIVERS!

You have to read it without reacting.

He says a lot of things you might not agree with, but then again you might. He has a temper tantrum about one of my faves on the web, Miss Snark - but if you overlook the writing - and really hear what he's saying - dere's some gems in dem dere blog fields.

There are a few spots that you have to look at with all the sarcasm and wit going on - that you just sit back and let it blow through your mind. Is he serious? Is he real? Is he really like that? It makes you want to dig deeper.

You see a lot of things when you're reading the blog. Someone who has become jaded. Someone obviously freaking smarter than me. Someone who can write like the dickens - including swear words and all sorts of things. Someone who isn't interested in helping --- yet... goodness gracious, turns around and helps out - probably without even knowing it.

My guess is that he's been burned one too many times in this industry. That's kinda sad - that the industry might really be like that. All of a sudden, people don't like you for who you are... but more "WHAT" you can do for them. Anyhow - plow through it.

I think it's a gem.

And I'm a nice person. Honest.

But sometimes in my head, I, too, have these little conversations with myself about this person (who is an idiot) or that person (who is a total arse). And those conversations with myself heat up to about the same steam level as the person who writes this blog I've linked to up there.

Dear gawd! If I had half the guts to talk like that in real life!

I don't. So I'm still the nice me... LOL!

Besides, I'd never want to hurt anyone's feelings. I'm kind of odd like that.

Anyhow - the arrogance, the charm, the wit... Holy Toledo! Just freaking amazing!

So click on the darn link already, would ya?

Lady M
PS. Alexandra - you better be having fun - we're missing you!

On A Whim... Because Miss Snark Said... LOL!

2006-03-05T07:27:00.000-09:00

OK - here's a sample of what I do on the "fly".

I'm going to post something I wrote in probably under 40 minutes. All because Miss Snark made a comment about "needing" something.

I like her blog - btw - it's informative, funny, inspirational and more. I wish there were more like her out there.

Anyhow - here it is. Please, don't think that this is the "best" that I can do --- nor think I should edit it.

I'm not "writing on the fly" to get published.

It's more of: Can I build a quick storyline... Can I punch out the Characters? Can I get dialog into sequence? Can I get some sort of "Hook" --- and all in under an hour.

So - you're free to tell me what you think (You can laugh at it - you can say it's horrible - you can say it's great - you can say it's so-so... I won't hold it against you, I promise... )

Miss Snark's Private Detective Story...

The Private Dick and The Ghost - By Lady M

It didn’t take long for the phone to ring, once I turned the damn thing on.

Surprising was the fact it wasn’t just another telemarketer or a bill collector. I can’t seem to get the money rolling when it is time to pay the bills. It seems to trickle in right about the time the cabinets get empty. But, I digress.

A breathy, female voice came on the answering machine and owing all of those bills, you know I’m not going to pick up the phone without checking to make sure it isn’t the credit card company... again.

“I hope that I have the right number,” the breathy voice said.

Shit. I’d forgotten to make a message for the machine. Oh freaking well.

“A friend of mine says you’re really good.”

Good? Good at what?

“I have a case I’d like you to take.”

Interested finally, I grabbed the phone. “Jordison, Private Eye.”

“Mr. Jordison?”

Ahhhh. Bright. Just the way I like them. Dumb and a little curvy. There isn’t anything like the not-so-bright woman. I like the Marilyn Monroe look, and if the gal has the same personality… Kowabunga! Match made in heaven!

“Yeah, speaking.”

“I need a private detective.”

And here I’d thought she was calling for a plumber.

“Well, ma’am...” Money, man. Think of the money. “That is what I do.”

“Oh good.” She paused.

Now go figure, I might be a private dick, but unless someone tells me what they want, I can’t read their minds over the phone.

“And what can I do for you?” I put on my best poker voice and tried to not get sarcastic. Remember, I’ve got to make the car payment every month before they decide to tow it away and give it back to the bank.

“I think I’m in trouble.”

Oh great. I’m a sucker for a dame on the brink of disaster. Happens every time. Some time, I’ll have to tell you about the wife that took the house. And she wasn't even my wife!

“What kind of trouble are we talking about Ma’am?” I ground my teeth.

“I’ve got a little problem.”

Oh this is getting better, I thought to myself. Yeah. She’s got trouble--and her little problem is not being able to articulate her trouble over the phone.

“What kind of problem?” Maybe if I repeated her questions back at her, she’d eventually spit it out.

“I think I’m dead.”

“Somebody is after you?”

“No. I think I’m dead. As in, I’ve been killed already. You know? Dead body. No heartbeat. Blood everywhere?”

I’ve looked at phones in many ways; To see if they were broken, to see if they had gunk on them and many other reasons, but right then I was staring at the handset just trying to figure out what was causing the earpiece to squawk impossible gibberish in my ear.

“What do you need help with; I’m sorry, I thought you just said you were already dead.”

“Well, I am,” she said a little indignantly.

“You are in trouble and think someone is going to kill you?” I again tried to help her out, because obviously she’d read one too many gothic books and had flipped her cookie.

“No, I’m in trouble. Or I was. And now I’m dead.”

“I see. Makes sense. All right, well, it was certainly nice talking to you.” And I hung up the phone. Just like that.

I looked at the clock on the wall. The sun had started going down and it was time to turn on the lights. But I really wanted to save that extra penny. I hadn’t had a case in over three months and after that call, it didn’t look too promising at that point either.

I figured I’d go make myself a hot dog.

I walked into the smallest kitchenette this side of Jersey and popped one of those suckers into the nuker. I’m not big on cooking. Probably why I’ve always liked dumb broads. They cook with a smile and the dishes are always done. Those smart ones are a real pain, you have to cook for them. And if I had a smart one, we’d both end up starving, and I don’t think that would be such a good idea.

The smell of the hot dog floated out of the microwave and got my stomach rumbling. I thought about the last time I’d eaten and I’ll be damned if I could remember when it was. Maybe yesterday. Maybe this morning. Who the hell knew? I just knew that I was hungry right then. And right then the smell was making Pavlov’s dogs look like dried up husks of whatever – and I was drooling like I was trying to fill up the Pacific Ocean.

I pulled the hot dog out of the oven and grabbed a piece of bread, making sure there wasn’t any mold I would have to pinch off. I yanked open the little rectangle that was supposed to be a refrigerator and grabbed the mustard, dumping on the watery part first until the real stuff came out. Great, the damn thing would be soggy.

I went to take a bite when a noise startled me. I held the dog up to my mouth, ready to take a bite as I walked out of that tiny, square part of my house.

Right smack dab into a ghost.

“I told you I was dead.” She said.

Now, I’ve read plenty of ghost stories in my time and they didn’t prepare me for what was standing in my hallway. She was knock out gorgeous and built to you know where. In fact, if I hadn’t been able to see my coffee table right through her, I wouldn’t have known she was a ghost. And never having seen a ghost at that point in my life, I wasn’t exactly sure what I should be doing.

She didn’t seem scary. I’d always pictured ghosts to be spooky and glimmery. Something you find in horror stories. But she looked just like a normal person – except she was a little see through. O.k. So she was a lot see through. But she still was a real looker.

She waited until I had caught my breath back and then nodded at me. I think I nodded back, but I’d realized that my hot dog was still poised an inch from my mouth and stopped mid way through, lowering the hot dog. I looked back at her and tried to think of something to say.

“Uhm, you gonna hurt me?” Was the first thing that popped out of my mouth.

A sad smile played at the corner of her mouth as she shook her head to the negative. Her short blond hair was cut in a curly bob and it shook right along with her.

“No Mr. Jordison, I just need your help.”

I decided at that point that I might as well put the hot dog down, so I turned slightly and set it on the kitchenette counter. I really didn’t want to take my eyes off of her. I’d never had a ghost in my house and I wasn’t so sure I liked the idea right then, either. Still, she didn’t seem like she was out to steal my soul or anything.

I turned back to her, “I’m not sure if I can help you.” I mean, she was dead. Right?

“I think you can. One of my friends told me about you and said you’d helped them out a few years back.”

One of her friends? Who?

“And who might that be?”

“Tony Postino.” Good old drug czar Tony. At least he had paid his bills on time. I kind of missed him. He'd given me some pretty interesting cases.

“How the hell did a nice girl like you get to know Tony? Wasn’t he killed a few years ago?”

She nodded. “He told me this morning.”

Just like that. She couldn’t break it to me easy or nothing. No. She had to go and tell me that ghosts were talking to each other and that meant more of them were out there. Shivers started dancing up my spine.

“Great.” I glanced at the couch. I think I needed to sit down, but I wasn’t too keen on going through her. “Mind if we sit down?”

Her ghostly image looked around at my place. Pizza boxes stacked up on the table. A few beer cans, empty, I’m sure, laid on their sides. Newspapers all over the place. You know. A bachelor pad. It isn’t so bad when you’re the only one living in it, but when she got that look on her face that said she’d rather stay dead than sit on my couch, I had to rethink whether my place was fit for even myself to live in.

“Yeah. I get it.” I moved past her, making sure I didn’t bump into her. She kind of floated to the side a bit. Maybe she didn't want to touch me either.

I shoved the newspapers onto the floor and dusted the crumbs and cigarette ashes off the couch. She made it obvious that she needed a clean spot. Me, I don’t care so much what I sit on, just as long as it isn’t wet. Nothing like having a wet pair of pants on.

She sat down gingerly on the edge of the cushion. I could see the seams of the couch right through her. So far, she hadn’t seemed threatening or even mildly scary. She seemed more like she was that lady in that invisible girl movie. You know, the one where she kept turning invisible? I don’t know if she was solid enough to feel, but at that point I wasn’t gonna touch her.

Do you blame me?

I sat down on the other side of the couch. Far enough away that I could jump off if she made a move. I hoped like hell that she didn’t have superhero speed or anything, but how was I supposed to know?

“So what’s your name?” I asked her after trying to make myself feel a little more comfortable. Although how one is supposed to feel comfortable with a ghost sitting on their couch, no matter how cute they might be, is something I’ll never figure out.

“I don’t know.”

“You don’t know your own name?” I looked at her and realized that she was pretty upset by all of this. I tried to think of something else to ask her, something that wouldn't upset her any further.

“So when did it happen?”

“Well see, Mr. Jordison, that’s part of the problem. I’m not really sure.”

“Fine, then. Let’s kind of narrow it down. Shall we?”

“O.k.” She looked a little dubious, but hey, if Tony had suggested me, then I was going to try and help her. Besides, I already told you, I’m a sucker for dames in trouble. Even partially invisible ones. Sigh.

“What were you doing last week?”

“I was working.”

“You work? Good, where do you work?”

“I work at Lydon’s Publishing Company. I read articles before they are published, I pre-edit them.”

“Where’s Lydon’s at?” I had no clue. I don’t often get down to the business district. I’m more of a small town kind of guy.

“It’s on the waterfront. At least it used to be.”

“What do you mean it used to be?”

“Tony and I took a walk down there today and it wasn’t there anymore.”

“What kind of company is there now?

“There isn’t anything there.” She looked at me a little strangely. “Trees are growing there now, tall ones. Pines, I think.”

Oh. I wondered what that meant, but decided to let it pass.

“What was the last major event you remember happening?”

She scrunched up her face a little bit and it made her nose kind of tweak up a little. I thought it was cute.

“Babe Ruth just hit 60 home runs.”

I jumped off the couch. She was a ghost that was older than my mother!

Now as a guy, it is my primary duty to know certain things and I damn sure knew that 1927 was the year the Bambino tossed in the 60 home runs. I wasn’t even a sparkle in my parent’s eyes. Hell. I wasn’t even a sparkle in my grandfather’s eye at that point. This blond bombshell that was semi-invisible was older than most members of my dead family.

No wonder she was dead.

“Well. That’s why you’re dead. It happens to be 2006.” I figured I’d solved her problems and she could go merrily haunting someone else for all I cared. I just had to figure out how to shoo a ghost out of my pad.

She looked at me and her bottom lip started quivering. I knew it. She was gonna cry. Damn, if there is one thing I can’t stand, it’s a dame that’s gonna cry.

“I know time has passed, Mr. Jordison. I just don’t know who I am or why I died.” A tear dripped down her cheek, glistening. It looked just like any other tear in this world.
: Wet, silvery and sad.

I rolled my eyes. Fine. I’m a sucker. I’m a numbnuts. I’m an idiot. Heaven help me from myself.

“Fine. I’ll help you.”

For the first time, I got a wide smile, and she was deadpan gorgeous. Sheesh. My knees went weak and I knew right then I was in trouble.

Deep shit was more like it.

Sad News...

2006-03-04T00:51:00.000-09:00

I play in an online gaming community that is text based.

Sort of like a forum, turn taking, number crunching, fantasy based place.

It's a very awesome place in some ways and annoying too - I've stubbornly held in there and am trying to change the place around to "good vibes". I've been there for almost 3 years.

In this place, you create groups of alliances and your team uses might or magic to defeat other teams or players (in their kingdoms) in order to gain a higher score. You must build your world and you must work together in order to succeed.

I am the creator of such an alliance. In the alliance we speak daily - usually of the game and we sometimes share our lives.

One of my alliance mates and her brother are avid players of the game, and they are great fun. The other day, the brother came online - and let us know that his sister, our team mate, had committed suicide last weekend, which was why her kingdom had not taken any turns.

Needless to say, it stunned all of us. Someone whom we had been in contact with on a daily basis... Someone who had helped us out, who had been a shining example of fun and knowledge. Someone who had been there when others could not be, and who had been exciting, young and contagiously humorous - she... she had taken her own life.

Wow.

What a mind blower.

Our alliance is now feeling the loss, not only in game play, also in the lack of humor in posts.

It made me realize something.

It made me realize that the internet has become a way of life for some of us. And that the people we meet online actually do affect us in our REAL LIVES offline.

That the people are real on the other side of the computer screen that they sit on. That there is a human element in all of this communication that we are doing.

I never really thought about it much before ---- I've always thought of the "I" in internet to mean singly "ME". But now I realize it isn't true. It is more than that. It is a million pen pals. A million friends - that while they may never meet you face to face... they are just as real as the friends you hold dear in Real Life.

Strange...

I never thought I would think that way.

But it is very true.

So I wanted you to know ---- if you're sitting there reading my blog and choose to interact with me ---- or if I've gone and visited yours, I'm now going to start "seeing" the real people behind the words and treating them all like people I should love and cherish, just like the people in my life offline.

Lady M

Cough... Hack... Cough... Sorry about that loogie...

2006-03-03T08:47:00.000-09:00

I'm at the end of this cold. (One hopes, truly!)

The end is always the worst for me. It's when the body says:

"Finally, we've got you cornered you little mucousites! Now come out with your hands up and MARCH! MARCH! That's right... keep going - out the nose, out of the lungs, it doesn't matter - Just MARCH! Forward Ho!"

And the defeated enemy creeps or slithers forth to leave the hostile territory.

Which, of course, since I am the hostile territory, I must endure the tireless march, and even Nyquil - the godsend that it is, even if it tastes icky - doesn't seem to be able to speed up the process.

Although, I'm sure that by now the march is almost finished - I feel as though it is the start of "The Flight of the Bumblebees". (Ha - I bet you don't know what that is... neener neener!)

Ok so on to other topics. *cough*

As I am typing this I am thinking about how good a cup of coffee... A mocha or something sounds... Or a cup of Earl Grey.

It sounds almost as good as a good book, curled up on the couch, with the window wide open.

I'm watching the snow fall outside as I type.

Yeah... I'm one of those people who are lucky that they don't have to look when they type. It only sucks if you happen to glance back and realize your fingers for the last forty paragraphs were poised in the wrong position. And then you have to read everything to see if it makes any sense - and try to decipher it... because you can't make the muse always repeat itself - at least I can't.

The first time I write something - it's almost magical. If I try and repeat it - then - it almost sounds like cardboard cake with frosting on it. Yeah - it looks good. But it kind of lacks that real spirit. That "in-tune" ness. That life that it had.

I've tried it a few times. The only time it works is if I'm re-working a piece.

Or --- and here's the total exception... IF I've had so much coffee that I can't think straight... Then I can rework the piece and it'll sound ok.

For some reason - when I let go - when I really let go... that's when I write my best. When the feelings flow and the characters come alive.

Once - my friend came over and was just sitting there watching me - stare off into space and type - and she said I'm like this weirdo-channeler... You know the kind I'm talking about... Those psychics who channel other dead people and write for them.

I'm like - oh boy... great - I'm a seance writer. LMAO!

But what's even funnier - when she said that - it also kind of intrigued me and gave me a storyline for a book.

Strange - how things can prompt you to write certain types of stories.

*cough*

Ok - so - I'm signing off for the day - please spray the place with some Lysol so the germs don't follow you home.

Hugs.

Lady M

Recipe... Salmon / Halibut Poppers

2006-02-28T06:50:00.000-09:00

So this forum I belong to has a discussion about whether or not fish feel pain.

Being an Alaskan, no matter how transplanted I may be, fishing is kind of a matter of breathing for a lot of people.

I - myself - enjoy fishing with the family... We do a lot of combat fishing here. (Shoulder to shoulder, everyone trying to catch the huge King Salmon that is drifting past, playing Let's Make a Deal - hook number one? Hook number 2?)

I call my kind of fishing, bloodsport fishing. Now don't go feeling pity for the fish. In fact, it isn't the fish that I bloody up... See... it's like this:

I play the "dumb fishing girl". I cast wildy about, catching several guys - one right after the other. This causes them to move quite a ways from me. I'm not sure why, I suppose they do have some sort of life preservation going on... hmmmm...

So finally - after I get a good 20 foot clearance going on - I set my pole - and I usually walk out of there with a fantastic King Salmon or Red Salmon... whistling dixie, as the guys just look mournfully at my catch. I suppose, if they were all looking at me - I'd be flattered... But knowing the Alaskan Male, I know they have only eyes for the fish on my catch line.

Sigh...

Anyway - I get home and the hubby get's to filet the fish... Then I get to cook it.

So sitting here talking about all this stuff on the other forum, I shared a recipe that I made - and got some great feedback. I figured I'd share it here.

Heck it's my blog - and I'll share if I wanna. *g*

Salmon (or Halibut - which is even yummier!) Poppers

Pack of premade refrigerated or frozen Lumpia wrappers

(if you're going for a big group get quite a few wrapper packs and sit down and make these - also - I make a ton of them at once and freeze them before cooking them.)

Fish cut up into thin strips - or chunks if you prefer.

(strips about 3 inches long, 1/4 inch cubed - chunks about 1/2 inch cubed)

Cream Cheese - depending on how many you're going to make but I figure 2 boxes Philly for every set of Lumpia wrappers.

Green Chiles - I use the chopped green chiles in a can - 2 small cans per set of Lumpia Wrappers.

Salt, Garlic Powder, Pepper

So get your cooking oil going - I use a Frydaddy type of deep fryer, but you can do this in a skillet as well.

In a Lumpia Wrapper - place fish, cream cheese, green chilies, seasonings, roll it according to directions on the wrapper (kind of like a burrito) and then deep fry until crispy golden brown.

Now - some of my friends make them huge and use two wrappers - you'll have to experiment for your own choices.

I sometimes substitute veggies (asparagus is YUM like this) or other seasonings --- or jalapeno's for my husband who likes them.

You can play with the recipe - but trust me, once you do this - you'll be creating all sorts of fun stuff... Add cheddar cheese, add broccoli, add different meats...

Enjoy!

Alrighty then - I'm off to bed.

Sweet dreams!

Yah OK. Try me. - gimme 8 words...

2006-02-26T18:52:00.000-09:00

Ha ha ha...

I'll bet you dimes to dollars, or crickets to cribbage (or any of those old, worn out sayings), that I can make you a poem, designed for you out of those 8 words.

So if you have something you want written about, poetically - give me the license (8 words or more and a title --- or not... :P ) and I'll put something up whimsically created for you!

Yeah YOU - sitting there - with your finger up your nose.

(I have a spycam sitting on your window sill, so I see all. No, no, no... You're supposed to flick 'em!)

So where was I? Oh yes.... 8 words.

Try me.

I'm a Poet... Or is that Poetess... Or shoot - I'm a rhymin' fool...

2006-02-26T06:14:00.000-09:00

As another blog (The Wry Writer) pointed out, sometimes titles are oft hard to come by.

I've always been lucky - whether anyone else likes them or not, I like making up titles. Sometimes that is what gets me started. Making up the title first and then creating the whole story idea behind that title. I also like to make up words ahead of time that I am going to use; especially if I am writing poetry.

(Just so you know I write lyrics for a band that I am in, and every once in awhile --- the band sucks, we're garage bound forever --- I like to amuse people by having them give me words and making up songs on the spot, using their words.)

For example uhm... well... alrighty then... Let me imagine a title for a poem...

Hold on... It's gotta be unique, ya know? I'm scratching my head, and probably some other unmentionables... but we won't discuss that here...

Oh darn... There I go again, saying that word - no wait - w r i t i n g "THAT" word. It seems to fall over from my Alaskan dialect, we talk about butts a lot here. Just in case you ever wondered. I'm sure you were wondering...

Well, nevermind that. Back to making up a title... Something unusual... GOT IT!

Eureka!

(Did you see that little flashing light bulb above my head? Oh... you mean it was just my imagination? Sigh... Well darn... I saw it.)

You all know that I'm a recent fan of the Miss Snark blog - right?

(Nod your head up and down if you knew... and if you didn't side to side.)

Well I am. It's a very amusing and informative blog... So let us just imagine these words for a title:

Once Upon a Snark (oh yeah baby, this could get interesting)

Now that the title is out of the way - let me think about words... We know some that absolutely must be in the poem... Gin, blog, writers, advice, agent. Those must be in there...

Let me throw some other fun ones in... Hmmmm... Got it!

Persevere, query, stilleto, horde, wondrous (I gotta use that somewhere...)

Ready?

Alright - here we go... cracking the knuckles, centering the fingers on the keyboard...

Once Upon a Snark

Once a visiting, I did go -
To learn about things I did not know.

I fell into a wondrous blog -
Whereupon an agent did log.

Thoughts that belong to agentkind -
And keeping writers straight in line.

Biting comments said with a grin -
Tossed back, with a swig of gin.

Laughter ensued, and things were learned -
Watch out writers, you might get burned.

Should you query or should you cry?
I found Miss Snark did not lie.

She didn't hold anything back -
She told you if she thought you did lack.

She also had praise for those who deserved -
The rest of us, she said "persevere".

She gave out hints, to those in need -
And into their minds sent a precious seed.

Go forth and write - the battle scream -
But don't you ever try to query me.

For I'll stomp on it with a stilletto'd heel -
You'll lie there as your senses reel.

But at the end of the day -
You'll thank me, that's what you'll say.

So much advice - upon the board -
It's fantastic to find such a horde.

So now I make it my daily lark -
To go and read - to visit Miss Snark!

Hey now, I hope you weren't expecting Longfellow or any major poet - I told you - I do lyrics for fun! LOL!

Anyhow - welcome to my little moment of insanity. In a strange way, I hope it's contagious!

Lady M

Inspiration...

2006-02-25T05:54:00.000-09:00

I don't often click on links people give me.

Today I ran across one that made me curious so I clicked on it.

WOW! Was this an inspirational story.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UBYPaNc57Ik

It takes a little while to load up - but I think it is completely worth it.

The link takes you to a newscast. One where a major syndicated newscaster tells a brief story about a young man with a disability... Autism. It shows how, during only one basketball game, he made an extreme difference for his highschool team.

Take a moment of your day and get inspired.

I think you will find it worth the time and the wait.

Let me know what you think.

I think I am so inspired after watching that clip ---- and reading ALG's blog on Live Journal that I am going to start writing another story.

http://alg.livejournal.com/72895.html?page=2#comments

It's a great piece on pitching, and if you haven't read it from the MISS SNARK blog - please take a moment and read it. She has some excellent advice to give to authors who are pitching their MS.

Strange... The things that can inspire you.

See ya tomorrow!

The Snark is Missing!

2006-02-24T08:50:00.000-09:00

Oh dear...

I've gone to go get my daily fix of ruffled feathers and gin, and what do I behold?

The "SNARKETTE" is missing in cyber space!

I suppose it is chapter 14 and the aliens have invaded Planet Earth - oh dear!

What will Miss Snark do? Will she cleverly defeat Blogspot and force them to bring back her amazing adventures? Or will she give up, allowing the Aliens from Blogspot to defeat her?

Stay tuned...

Same Snark time, same Snark Channel.

Nyquil should come in Chocolate Flavors...

2006-02-23T07:33:00.000-09:00

It's true.

Honest, it is.

Nyquil should come in Chocolate... or Chocolate Raspberry... or Vanilla swirled Chocolate.

Instead it has a nasty mint flavor that leaves a hideous "liquorish" (intentional) taste and feeling in your mouth...

And then... just when you think you've gotten through the worst of it - your stomach is on fire!!!! Dear Heaven what have you done to deserve this awful fate?

As if you're not already feeling puny enough.

Breathe! You tell yourself it will pass. You lie there writhing in agony as you wait and then it's gone... as if it never was.

At least if it was in CHOCOLATE flavors, you'd be able to snarf it down and get something out of the deal... You'd get rid of that Chocolate *yum* craving that you've had all week, but couldn't taste the candy bars, so why bother?

I'm a genius. What can I say? Half the women of the world would thank Nyquil makers if they just thought about what real women wanted half of their lives: Chocolate.

The other half, we split it up between: Guys, books, entertainment, work, children, exciting things, cooking, going out, our girlfriends, animals, gardening, internet, writing, singing, playing, school, gym, cleaning, sleeping and so on...

But half of our life is consumed by Chocolate.

In fact, Chocolate is so good, that I think I will forevermore CAPITALIZE the first letter in the word Chocolate. It has become a life force - it is living! It is YUM! It deserves that capital "C".

Oooops.

Did I just let the cat out of the bag?

Oh.

Well - if you're a guy and you're reading this, I'm throwing my super mega mind eraser on you about what you just read.

When you leave this page, you won't remember a thing about Chocolate... Except if you have a girlfriend, wife, sister, mother, friend who is a girl, co-worker"ette", neighbor who is a girl - or if you just see a girl walking down the street... You will get this overwhelming urge to buy them all Chocolate.

It's a secret.

So shhhhhhh.

And so the day goes...

2006-02-22T06:58:00.000-09:00

Yeah...

Well, where did it go?

Just a few minutes ago, I was waking up - throwing the sheets off the bed, slamming the snooze button on the alarm just to shut it up...

And somehow I managed to montage driving to work, being there, having a couple cups of coffee - answering the phones... Coming home... Taking sleeping child into bedroom...

Flash foward and I'm sitting here typing this.

And now it's time to go back to bed.

Interesting. Time flew away and I truly have no idea where it went.

I don't remember the drive home, but I hear that is common for people who drive the same routes day in and day out.

I don't remember the day at work much, except that I think I did everything right.

It could be the Nyquil, but perhaps I'm getting so old that my memory is fuzzing the distinct lines of reality and dreaming...

Oh - ok - it's the Nyquil... I know.

Sigh - but it was fun sitting here thinking of all these horrible diseases that I could possibly have had... Or imagine that I was blasted into a time warp... Or someone else invaded my body and took over for my waking hours, only to return it to me when it was time to go to sleep.

Ah sleep. Yessssssssssssssssssssssss.

Night night.

Memories Of Time Long Past...

2006-02-19T18:36:00.000-09:00

On another journal blog that I visited, someone mentioned something about elderly people and writing... It brought back memories, so I thought I'd share some of them with you.

(emeraldcite's blog - a link is in one of the last few posts, I'll place it on the right in a few days when I can figure out how to do so and have the inclination to actually click on the template for this blog and remember where and how to place it properly within the template.)

I remember my grandfather with amazing clarity. My grandparents raised me, so to speak, in more ways than one.

My grandfather was an amazing man and the older I get, the more amazing he actually was. I hope some day, to be remembered as an amazing person by my relatives, it is a way to be immortal for a few moments, in the future.

When I was little, younger than my daughter is now, he started calling me Josephine. I thought he was crazy, until I realized he called every female Josephine. I would hear Josephine and I would laugh and laugh, because I thought he had forgotten my name. Little did I know that it was probably his way of never mixing up a woman's name, to which, now, I know is probably an insult.

This knowledge, of looking back - and seeing it all through the much broader picture, made me realize, that my grandfather had probably been a bit unfaithful in his prime. But it doesn't truly matter, because that only adds to his laughter and his smiling ways.

He would tell the same joke over and over again, and he would laugh at himself - uproarishly so. We would all roll our eyes - and my grandmother would say "MO!" in that tone of voice that brooked no deals. He would then simmer down and open his newspaper, focusing on the cryptograms and the crossword puzzles being absolutely silent, until he started snoring.

When I was a child, living with them, I loved to listen to his snores rattle the windows and shake the house. It was comforting hearing that snore. It was like knowing that as long as he snored, I was safe and I slept soundly. When the house got quiet, I worried that he had quit breathing and I was terrified that he would be cold and dead if I dared peer into the bedroom. I would breathe a sigh of relief when the snores started again, and I would drift back to sleep.

I remember that he loved cribbage. He would play and play cribbage. He would boast and brag that he was the best player - and he would loudly exclaim each 15 for 2 points with a bravado and a "so there!" type of exclamation. Until one day, I beat him at his best loved game. He took his cribbage board downstairs to his favorite chair and I never saw it again. It wasn't that he was a poor sport, I realize now. It was that I had taken the one thing away from him that he was sure of - that he was good in cribbage. When a 13 year old beats you at a game that you thought you were a champion of, it must be hard to bear - because I think I hurt his pride... And even though I asked to play again - the board was banished and excuses were made.

I wish that I had let him win.

I think he had a collection of porn. I'm not entirely sure if the guys from work gave it to him, or not. But I think it was hilarious finding the titles on the VHS tapes when cleaning out everything. We never checked the tapes, but the names alone were enough to cause laughter, trying to imagine him watching them in front of my Victorian Iced Grandmother.

He loved her. My grandmother. She was his dream woman. He took care of her like a child and he never argued with her. She was a stringent woman who had high demands - and I loved her too. Very much so. I don't think people understood her. Now, when I look back at her ways, I have finally come to the determination that she probably suffered from severe bi-polar disorder and was addicted to pain medication.

My grandfather never uttered a bad word about her, no matter how many arguments she tried to stir up, he always carefully manuvered around them. Like a game they had been playing for so many years that it was natural for them.

They were comfortable with each other. I don't know if they were happy.

And I didn't know my grandmother loved my grandfather as much as he loved her until the day he died. A part of my grandmother died with him that day - and she died not more than a few months later.

I remember sitting there watching her, wondering how she could hold up under such pressure at his funeral. I thought she was being quite the uncaring woman, who laughed, did her makeup and made the funeral a social event. Until I watched her for a moment.

And even though she laughed in the hot Nevada sun, there was a fly crawling across her face. She didn't notice it. She didn't bat an eye, and as it crawled across her cheek, I realized that what we were seeing was a facade - that she had gone numb inside, realizing what she had lost.

I don't think for a moment that anyone else noticed. Everyone loved my grandfather. He was an icon, a hero and many more things than just a grandfather and husband. He'd lived through history - been written about in National Geographic and he had been a solid stone in our lives until the day he died.

My grandmother had always lain in bed, because she had been injured in an accident when she was a teenager, her back breaking, and it affected her as she got older. But truly - I don't think it was the injury that kept her in bed - like I said, I think she was Bi-polar and depressed, before anyone knew that such maladies existed. And no one cared, because her sharp tongue had already cut everyone enough - that it was safer to leave the tigress in her room.

But my grandfather had always been devoted to her.

I find that even more heroic than all of the other accomplishments of his lifetime.

And that fly... it made me realize that what I see in a person, their actions and everything they say or do ---- are not necessarily who they really are.

I'll never forget that.

And I think that maybe my grandmother died regretting many things - and for that, I love her even more.

Thank You for Visiting

2006-02-19T06:26:00.000-09:00

I've had a few visitors, and I find it very much an awesome thing to realize that someone stopped by and maybe read a paragraph or two.

While my head is still in some sort of chaotic disorder because of this cold, I don't think I should go off writing - because it comes out looking more like Alice in Wonderland...

And while in my head that is just fine, once it is on paper, I might embarrass myself... Tremendously.

Of course, hey, weren't some fantastic writers very wasted when they wrote? And they now have books that have laid waste to time?

Hmmmm...

I still think I should figure out a way bottle the head part - but not the cold part. LOL!

OK - going back to bed, sipping my Nyquil snifter and hitting the hay.

OH - and Thank you for coming by and reading - and posting. It makes me feel good, even if I'm totally out of it.

Sick Thoughts and Daughter Writes!

2006-02-18T23:57:00.000-09:00

Being sick makes you either totally brain dead ----- or worse, so infused with thoughts and you have absolutely no energy to type it out or get it from brain into readable format.

And it becomes lost.

Right now, I'm at work, and finally, after 3 weeks, my daughter's chest cold has caught me. I thought I had eluded it's grasp, but no... alas... it has me violently within it's clutches.

I was fine this morning. I truly felt that the world was right and life was good. And then somewhere in time, about 2 hours ago, I noticed this dreadful heaviness in my chest and my throat felt uncomfortable and tight and then my head started feeling like it was slowly being filled with saltwater taffy.

The world is starting to be viewed in a slanted way of wishing time would go fast and I could crawl back into bed.

I feel on the edge of illusion. That if I just close my eyes that these waves of uncomfortable chest and head cold will wash over me and away. Far away.

I knew completely that I was ill when I stepped outside, with nary a coat on and didn't feel the cold. It's a dead giveaway when you feel feverish in an Alaskan winter, that something is just not right.

And if I tilt my head to the side, the world tilts, just a few moments afterwards, giving the sense of vertigo. Oh yeah baby, people pay good money for gin and vodka to make them feel this way! Too bad you can't bottle the interesting mind process and perceptions of the world, without the achy, congested, horrible icky feelings combined within.

Now that would sell, I'm telling you.

I may be delirious right now - at least in keeping a coherent thought in my head is impossible - but this - if in pill or liquid form... the mind screw - would sell.

Add a little zippy to it and zap! You've got a selling potion that everyone would buy.

On a funny - very funny side note.

My daughter is 9. She's very, very intelligent. (So all mother's say of their children.) But this is no fooling. The kid knows how to work the internet better than her father or I, and we're both pretty good on it.

Anyhow, she was using my computer non-stop to do all sorts of little kid things - and I was losing out on writing time - and it just was awful - but what can you say to a kid who is only allowed to visit educational online sites with parental/teacher approval?

Not much - because your kid is learning at a phenomenally fast rate - and you can't stop her, because as much as you want to get on the computer - to see her understanding something - and then explain it to you... well... it's worth something that is so priceless a figure can't even be attached.

So last Christmas she asked for a Laptop Computer.

Well, now, I know most parents would laugh it off, but instead we didn't. We actually went out and got her a brand new laptop.

She set it up herself, with very little help from me. She had me show her how to add one game (Zoo Tycon, for those who are wondering), and she then proceeded to add the rest of the new games we got her on her own. I'm telling you, while she isn't a prodigy or anything, she's damn smart.

Anyhoooooo - back to the funny part.

Last night, after hubby and I were getting ready to go to bed, I go peek in on her to see what she is doing. And what do I see?

I see her at her computer.

I go cuddle up next to her to see what she's so intent on... and... there... on the computer...

Zip! Zap! Zang and How to Disappear
by Jaz (Her whole name spelled out)

And about 8 paragraphs to a story that she has painstakenly typed out.

Now - it isn't adult quality material - but for pete's sake - she's just turned 9 years old!

And it was well written, grammatically correct - and it was a real story.

She said she's writing a book.

LMAO!

You go girl!!!! I think to myself.

I encourage her - because, I think to myself - WOW! What if she can do it?

So I shall wait and see what happens - and wouldn't it be hilarious if she got published before me? ROFLMAO!

Life is so funny - especially when you are getting very sick.

Have a GREAT day!

Aaa aaaa choooooo!

Visiting other Blogs...

2006-02-17T21:09:00.000-09:00

I've been visiting other blogs since I started blogging.

Mostly they are from other writers or agents or someone within the industry of publishing/writing. (As I am trying to become more updated on these topics.)

I find they are varied and interesting. Each person has a different view of what is going on and they all have words of wisdom or questions that need to be answered.

Here is one I found that asked an entirely interesting question:

http://emeraldcite.blogspot.com/

In this blog, he asked how one knows if they are a good writer.

Except he phrases it as: One thinking they are a good writer and not knowing the truth - with everyone else thinking you are ghastly vs. actually being a good writer.

Something akin, he said, to American Idol participants who think they are good, yet you cringe as they open their mouths to emit some sort of camel mating calls.

I had to expound my thoughts on his site - because I believe that that is what blogs are for - sharing, thinking, expounding...

And while I think you just know - if you are a good writer... I can see his point. What if you "just know" and your knowledge is erred? LOL! Well - I'm sure it happens. But I see books published all of the time, that are less elegant than what I can write...

There are books that are published that are horrid compared to what I can output.

So all in all - the comparison, I believe is what makes one good - that and the readership.

Anyhow - the concept was his - and so if you'd like to read his blog, please, by all means do visit it --- oh singular reader - myself.... Ahh yes Lady M, I think I shall visit there once in awhile.

My question is - do other bloggers really appreciate it if you visit them and participate in their blogs?

Or is it taboo to just jump in and say what's on your mind?

I have a few sites that I've participated in, and I always believed that they were created to share and to talk back and ask questions in...

But what if I am wrong...

Hmmmm............

Pondering again.

Blue Houses and Bad Couches...

2006-02-17T09:29:00.000-09:00

Yeah...

I know...

Huh?

See where I live sits on a pond. Across the pond there are some houses. I get to stare at them regularly - when I have my cup of tea in the morning - late at night - when I'm sitting at my computer typing away.

(Might I mention, I'm a fast typist - not always perfect, sometimes too fast and therefore what I type is keeping up with my brain matter - making the same darn mistakes that my brain does!)

Anyhoooo.

There is this one house that they started painting. And it's a bright blue. I don't mean a dark blue or a pale blue -- that belongs on a house.... But a BRIGHT blue. The kind that belongs in a super nova or in a blue raspberry super sour candy. Blue like I've never seen before. Not light, not dark, but blue. Ick blue.

Don't get me wrong, I adore blue. I think it is a color that is amazingly versatile. But the line of where blue can be drawn is distinct - and this color blue does not belong on a house. Not even in my wildest dreams. And let me tell you - not even in your wildest dreams.

So perhaps I can get past the color blue that is being painted on this house.

But I cannot get past the dark brown bottom that is still on the house in combination with the blue. They have not finished this project and it is a two-toned house. So here I sit and I think - WOW. Someone please just put me out of my misery if I ever think to do this type of thing to my house.

Keep in mind, I don't live in the projects or barrio. I don't live in a poor neighborhood, by any means. Nothing too super fancy - but middle to upper middle class. And this house... it reminds me of drives as a child - through the middle of Watts - the sights and sounds I saw that showed me horrid awful architecture, colors and just a bunch of rambling, broken down homes.

It's just awful.

It could be the couch set that we just bought, too - that's put me in this mood. *A grumpy, can't find anything right with anything kind of mood*.

We bought a couch/love seat set. And it looks so beautiful. We paid decent cashola for it, and it looked so yummy comfy that I had to have it. I sat on it - I measured it, I loved it!

I get it to the house - and it's beautiful!

I sit in it for a few hours, bringing a table over for my lap top and it's gorgeous - feels good...

Until the next morning. My back is aching. I rearrange the cushions - and learn that the bottom cushions are all of one piece to the couch.

OMG - I call the company we bought it from and they are like - we don't take back large pieces of furniture after 24 hours unless there is a major workmanship defect --- but the cushions don't move... ah well - that was visible at the store... But they will have lumps in them in just a few months (since we're couch potatoes here at the house)... That is not our problem... Ahhh bummer.

So I have this expensive couch set - that is so uncomfortable to spend more than a few hours at... And I had thought it was going to be my "writing" couch. One where I could curl up and just type away on.

Sad to say - nope.

So me and my aching back and hind quarters are back to the formal dining room. And I hate it.

Can we say grumpy?

It's ok - there are a lot of wonderful things going on in my life. My girlfriend is waiting until this year's tryouts for American Idol and I'm taking her. She's got this amazing voice and look and I just think she'll be perfect.

I've written a book - and sent it to an agent.

My hubby is great - my kid is wonderful - if not a little spoiled.

I have my health - minus the aching back and posterior. I have a great puppy dog - who loves us to death. I have life - joys and a lousy couch.

What more could a gal ask for?

OK 2 bucks for free What the heck...

2006-02-16T06:27:00.000-09:00

I don't trust the credit card companies much any more. I've had a few snafus on my bills and decided I would prefer going to a prepaid card.

I jumped on to this card that they sell at Safeway - you can recharge it there, etc. etc. For all my online purchases...

And they sent me this thingie that gives referrals 2.00 if they use your code when they start up the cards...

So ALL you blog readers of mine (yeah, I'm talking to myself again), if you are interested in a prepaid credit card that you can refill at Stores, etc. It's called NETSPEND...

And here's 2.00 for free. (Whoopie!)

To redeem:
Purchase a card. Visit netspend.com for a retailer near you.
When activating the All-Access Visa or Netspend Cash Card, enter the code provided and get a $2 credit to your account.
REFERRAL CODE: 3352558858
No credit application. No Bills.*Limit one referral credit per card activation. Credit amount subject to change at any time for any reason. Copyrights NetSpend Corporation 2001-2005.

I will be honest, the card has worked like a charm for me, so I don't feel too bad if anyone actually does use it from reading my blog. It isn't a scam.

So since I'm on the credit card kick - why not blog about it?

Lessee - I'm terrible with credit cards. I have the worst luck around when it comes to people double charging me, not checking the bills to confirm purchases... Scam companies bilking me... And I could go on with the horror stories.

Let's just suffice it to say, I think that some time ago, I realized that if I didn't have the cash, I didn't need it.

I'm very fortunate - I'm not wealthy, but I live comfortably with my family. We don't have everything we want and there are days when the bills are barely making the paycheck to paycheck monthly cycle... But we've been blessed and lucky. We don't have to eat Top Ramen or peanut butter and crackers all day.

We have what we need - and what we don't need is a credit card to spoil that.

And yes - credit cards have spoiled that in the past.

I got charged way more one time by this scam company. Let me tell you this little story... I trust financial institutions... NOT!

See I pay for something - 50.00. OK good, the company gets the approval code. That same 50.00 never gets taken out - and the time lags. Company puts in for another 50.00 and gets code... time lags again... money gets put back on card. Again and again the company does this - getting the approval codes for the purchase... and letting it lag.

You get the service or product. But you think you're only paying 50.00.

Well - lo and behold - the bank calls you and says - You owe them some astronomical amount of money. HUH?

What for?

Excuse me - do you have the right phone number?

Did I purchase XXXXXXXXX for 50.00? Well Certainly I did, why is that a problem?

What is my ISP number? Well - it is ABABABABABABAB

Uh huh... WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?

HOW FREAKING MUCH?

Let me speak to your boss. Now. No. Put the damn phone on hold and get me the manager. You're the manager? What in the world are you talking about? There is no way on EARTH that I owe you XXXXXXXX for one 50.00 purchase.

I bought HOW many?

Pardon me (gasp, water, fainting spell).

And just how am I responsible for this?

Oh because I signed an account paper and had a card - and you can prove the original order came from my computer?

Excuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuse me. Hellllllllllllllllloooo. Is there anyone home there? Didn't you just hear me I purchased only ONE - ONE - ONE - ONE thing.

I don't care what that piece of paper you are holding says... It's not right.

Fine. I'll obtain an attorney.

Good.. Good. I'll see you in court!

Needless to say - the attorney cost more than it was worth - I still had to pay the freaking amount because the original purchase was traced to my computer...

Although - me and God (or whatever you believe in) - and the Scamming Company KNOW I only ordered and got ONE of the item.

I think the bank knew too, but not until after the whole process was over. And then they couldn't go back on a policy issue just to refund me.

I may have been one of the first people hit with this scam so it may have looked legit to them. I know in my heart of hearts, it was illegal, wrong and incredibly messed up.

My bills are now paid - but I swear - NEVER AGAIN will I trust a financial institution.

*choice words here being said under my breath*

Alas... So there... That's why I only do prepaid cards now.

And I refuse to use a revolving credit card or one associated with my bank accounts.

And this is why I think that NetSpend's prepaid card is worthy of the mention at all - and hey - if you're going to use it - (my faithful reader - me) then at least pick up the 2.00 for free!

LOL!

Hey - have a great night... Some days are hilarious - when you look back at them.

Officially I am now a paid writer...

2006-02-15T17:58:00.000-09:00

I finally have something to put on my professional credits - I've been paid for some reviews on a gaming site!

I don't know whether 250 - 500 word reviews would account for professional credits, but I shall use them anyway! And the money for them - well - hey, that's just a side trip. Something that won't last forever.

The reviews were dashed off in a competition type of atmosphere and out of quite a few people, 7 reviews of mine were chosen. Can you say "Wow!"? I can.

It's the first time I've been paid for my writing - except for poetry and lyrics, I've made some money (very tiny pocket change... think quarters, dimes and nickels) from selling them to others. At one time I created a write-it-for-you type of poem boutique. I sold about 8 of them. Nice, but not noteworthy.

One of the things that I find most fun to do, is to be told what is wanted - and to create something out of it - especially in a competition format. I am soooooo competitive.

I also enjoy people giving me a series of words that are not related and writing poems out of them that make sense. Seconds baby, seconds - that's all it takes for me to create them. And I have fun doing so.

So if you're up for it and wanna see some funny stuff, toss me about eight or nine words. I'll dilly dally and make a "special" poem for you.

Oh my goodness - I'm a paid professional writer now! It may never see the light of day - but the place paid me for my words. I may never be able to credit the place - but hot damn! I'm in! Like Flynn! (Ya know... ya think Errol minds us using him so many generations later?)

So what are you waiting for?

TEST ME BABY!!!

Let me show you what I'm made of besides just sugar and spice and everything nice.

Give me 8 words.

See the results - LIVE!

No web cam action, but hey - your words, my talent - and Voila! We have a winning prose selection.

Yeah, I know - all of one lonely, bored reader - who accidentally clicked on my blog is going to read this... And they're not going to be bored enough to write me - even if they've managed to read this far.

But that's o.k.. Because some day (at least in my grandiose dreams) some one will actually come and laugh at these ramblings.

Until then,

Have a splendid day!

Sir Spamalot Strikes... But WHY?

2006-02-15T07:47:00.000-09:00

I get this in the email today... Everyone gets these kinds of things but this one... I dunno... This one gave me pause and then made me laugh.

Do You have enough pwoer to provide your patrner high
quality SE-X on St. Valentine day?
Get a MON-STER pwoer, nothing can bring your ererction down!
Show your partner the PWOER of your LOEV and she will always remember You.
Loev will ALWAYS be associated with YOU!
Your order will be PRIVATE, nobody will know what You use.
Follow this link and get SSPECIAL DISSCOOUNT for that period:

http://blahblahblahblahwebsite.com

So I actually read this. If it can be called reading material.

I think to myself. WHY? And most important of all - WHY ME?

First, it is so badly written that a second grade dropout could have done better.

Second, I uhm... well... uhm... don't... uhm... have... uhm.... a thingamabobber that gets erected... Yeah.. uhm... I mean... Uhm... My hubby does... But I don't own one... on my... uhm... body.

And why would I want MON-STER pwoer? That leaves me imagining evil, creepy, crawling things. And that certainly wouldn't put me in the mood for this so called LOEV that is talked about in this short blurb.

And what in the goodness gracious is Sspecial Discooooooount? Do I really want one? I don't have a thingamabobber and I don't want MON-STER Pwoer and I wouldn't be ready for LOEV to have S-EX and have it all associated with me ------ with HER.

Dude - get spell checker.

And while you're spell checking ask yourself this grand question:

What makes you think that I'm going to click on anything but the delete button? And how did you manage to get through my spam filter...

And why do you bother? You're so wasting my time and yours.

OK. I feel better now.

You want to know something even more funny?

The author of the little ad...

Was...

Get this...

Michael Jackson

Have a nice day everyone!

Snow and the Views of Life... Snow Musings

2006-02-13T17:49:00.000-09:00

Reading another blog - which is fastly becoming quite a habit, I came across a post about the weather in New York.

(Which happens to be experiencing a large, robust storm at the moment. Complete with... you guessed it... Snow!)

Where I live snow is second nature for many months of the year - it is par for the course. Although there truly are no igloos - unless they are having a competition for igloo building or one gets stuck in the arctic, there is no reason for them. Since we all live in houses and do not drive mush dog teams to work.

(Someday I will elaborate on Alaska - however this post is about something else, entirely different - about something that amuses me.)

Sometimes I find things highly amusing.

Like... the snow.

Yes. The snow is amusing.

Perhaps not the snow itself, but the reaction of people regarding the snow.

It varies greatly with each person - and each individual has such a unique outlook on it - that I thought maybe this might be a way to explain how people view "LIFE" in general.

Figure it this way:

Some stare at the snow in wide-eyed wonder. Childlike. Amazed that such a wondrous thing could fall from the skies to blanket the earth. They long to play in the snow, build snowmen and skate on the frozen lakes. They can't wait for enough snow to pile up outside so that they can exuberantly make snow angels and build forts within the white wonderland. They stand outside - tongue exposed to catch the tiniest snowflake in order to envelope the snow within and to taste this tiny miracle from above.

Some stare at the snow in misery and anguish. Their eyes are seeing a day filled with nothing but traffic snarls and the shoveling of walkways. They hold no joy in watching the flakes fall, but instead think of the heating bills that must be paid. They imagine how long they will be captured inside because they will not be able to go outside since it is too cold and too much of a bother to try and walk or drive in such slippery and annoying stuff.

Some watch the snow with an "artiste's" eye. Imagining Kincaid paintings of cozy houses and warm fires. They long to cuddle up to their loved ones - or with a book beside a fireplace. They watch the sparkling streets as they drive, amazed at the beauty of a crystalline world. They drink hot cocoa with tons of marshmallows and equate the falling snowflakes to post cards and holiday cards. They immerse themselves in the feeling of holidays and family dinners and get togethers. They blow warm air on the windows and make designs on them, tracing patterns or letters, or even little hearts.

Some take no notice of the change in weather at all, other than to accommodate with the necessary clothing or transportation. They march steadfastly to work, school or whatever daily routine they have going on. Barely noticing the change in temperature or the iciness surrounding them. They ignore the frostbiting temperatures and walk into work prepared to do business just as any other day - expecting everyone else surrounding them to do the same. To them, it matters not if there is snow on the ground or not - it doesn't seem to phase them one way or another.

Interesting I say.

Perhaps seeing the different varieties I have chosen to exemplify the views of snow - you might see yourself - in the way that you view life.

Which one are you?

Why Blog?

2006-02-12T18:46:00.000-09:00

I have been playing around with the fonts and font types for this journal.

What an interesting concept - to blog.

Perhaps we should say: To blog or not to blog... that is the question.

Why do people blog? Why am I blogging?

Before I answer that, I must answer the questions that provide the clues for all written materials: Why do people write.

Well silly... To communicate, of course.

We, as humans need to communicate.

Some of us perform communication daily to our friends and family - we tell them verbally what we think, what we've done, how we feel and what our plans are.

In this day and age, families and friends are spread out far and wide - to distant remote areas.

Before the advent of the Internet, we wrote letters or called on the phone. Now that the Internet has become a way of communication, we can produce so much more communication - to share with so many more people, than ever before.

So why do we blog?

We blog so that we can communicate. Whether it be solely to ourselves or to share our thoughts and ideas with others.

Some of us want others to read what we write and say - "Ooooh. I so identify with that person!".

Or we want them to talk back to us in our own personal forum type of blog, where comments are the way to communicate to the reader of the blog. (Even if it is only ourselves reading it.)

I blog, because I need to write. To shape my words into a form of communication, and because I want to network with others of a like mind (writing, reading, introspection, etc.). I would like participation, but I know that at the same time, this blogging - well... it's kind of personal.

I hope that answers your questions.

On a side note, I started blogging after I read a few agent's blogs. (Yes, publishing industry agents.) I liked what I read, and I have placed one of the blogs in my links section.

So if you are into humor or other blogs, might I suggest that you visit this link?

You are sure to be captivated, as was I.

Sleep - It comes unbidden...

2006-02-12T07:25:00.000-09:00

Insomnia.

It's preferable to sleep for me... If only my body agreed.

I wish that I could stay awake forever - and not have to rest this vessel of life. There are so many things to see, to do - that it is a shame to not be able to do it all.

I breathe life in and exhale experience.

And now, I must shut my eyes, for the light is coming up through the window and I need to be refreshed for the next bout of work and writing.

My Job

2006-02-11T20:01:00.000-09:00

I am at work, and at the place where I work, there is nothing to do at this second.

Sure, there are papers that can be gone through - things to be filed. But my soul holds no joy for these petty actions. I want to be doing something exciting - something fun.

However... At my job there is something unique... Something that keeps me here... Something that is worth all the moments of boredom.

Sometimes it happens quickly and is over in seconds.

Other times it can last the entire shift.

The adrenaline rush, the knowledge that what I do has an effect on others, that I control - if only for a few moments - the destiny of lives in my hands and that I must be very careful or the very lives I hold can be destroyed beyond repair.

I am a good person and I know this to my core. It isn't a power trip to feel the adrenaline, but more of a worry that I won't be able to save this one. Or that one. Or that someone truly could die if I spoke the wrong word.

Funny...

Not in the ha-ha-ha kind of way - but in the odd, strange, bizarre kind of way.

Funny that words can change a life in a matter of moments.

Words can communicate ideas, thoughts, meaning - directions, feelings, needs, wants and desires.

Words are through which all are made equal or left in the dust to wither and die.

Words are amazing things and daily I must use them to persuade, to plead, to agree, to share and to demand in order to make sure that everything runs smoothly.

And yes - lives do depend on my words... Daily.

So perhaps while I may be bored at the moment, this is a job where I make a difference without being noticed, because at the end of the day - it is not "I" who is labeled the hero - but someone else.

And I think that this is Ok.

Yesterday

2006-02-11T05:56:00.000-09:00

My solicited query arrived yesterday...

Yesterday...

Now I have no idea what will happen. Will I get a quick - thanks, but no thanks?

Or will I get the almost even more dreaded: Please send full MS?

I'm a newbie and I want to scream, I should be spending every single waking moment writing my MS and editing it. I should have everything completed, but not knowing if it is good enough or if it is ready for someone else to read - even though... sigh... I do know it's good enough... Well... It's driving me nuts.

I know I write well - I know I can paint pictures with my words. I don't know how I learned to do it - it just happened.

It's like magic flows through my fingertips and no matter what I am writing about, I can expound it gracefully.

I shall edit the MS again tomorrow at work. That way I can feel it - live it - breath it. And it shall be beautiful. That and a few cups of coffee will get me what? A dollar? Hmmmm....

We shall see.

Finally

2006-02-10T13:22:00.000-09:00

Finally, I submitted to an agent.

It's only a story I've had laying around in the whirlpools of my mind for ages.

It's only my blood spilled figuratively onto pages.

I picked out an agent - based on my perception of what she is. I didn't think about what she could do for me, but more of what I could do for her.

I read other people's writings and I know, down to my soul, that the way that I write - for the correct reader can be astounding.

Is that egotistical of me? No. It's truth. I may need polishing and I may need a little more time to get it more perfected, but my writing is the one thing I've held on to throughout all of my years of life.

I have no idea what she will say about the partial she requested. I have no idea if she'll even read it. But I do know that it is a good set so far.

I keep pulling the story out and thinking of how to fix it. Perhaps I'll rewrite it all during the next week or so. Before she can slam me down with a rejection - before she can say - sorry... this isn't for me...

But even if she does - I believe in me now. And I think I have what it takes to do this.

But I will admit, I'm terrified.

So - I cross my fingers instead.

Time Tells All

2006-02-10T11:12:00.000-09:00

Today is the day...

I tell myself this as I sit down and prepare to write an online blog.

I've always been a private person - terrified that if the world views the real me... The one that I've kept hidden from everyone, all of my life - they will take one look, and see me for the idiot that I've always believed myself to be.

Until just very recently, I never believed that my writing was good enough for the eyes of others.

It took the love of one man and the strength of my friends to teach me that perhaps... Just perhaps... I have talent within that should be shown to the world.

For once in my life I am starting to think that I just may have what it takes to write professionally.

I've always written.

If there was pen and paper or some other way to get words written down, I've used it.

The words felt like a demon that needed to come forth and spill out; poetry, stories, journals, little quotes, thoughts, ideas and even just daily lists or plans. It didn't matter. I just had to write.

Some days the words flowed like madness, spreading across the pages to plague my hands with cramps and empty my mind. Leaving me drained and exhausted like a marathon torture session, yet at the same time lightening my spirit and awakening the bloodthirst for even more writing.

Other days, the words stuttered into existence, needing to be transcribed - but taking their precious time to burst forth into being.

Deep you say?

Well step into my mind and fall into the pools of thoughts swirling and churning in rapid succession.

Dark you say?

Not at all. In fact, very uplifting. Very calming and extremely enlightening.

How can such an in depth, introspective process be enlightening?

Simply, I say...

For, if I had not written all those moments in my life, I believe that I would never have survived the past. I would have perished in the need to express the constant flow of creativity. I would have had no existence without those words...

And now, believing in myself - where I once believed myself to be nothing but a fool - I believe that this alone - this incredible need to create words into something coherent...

This...

This...

This is what makes a true writer.

The Lady M Writes

I'm still Alive... Just getting functioning...

Treatment - and I'm still alive.

Just a quick update...

For Amanda Brice - Heather - LOOKING 4 LOVE - MOCK COVER

Mark Pettus - MOCK COVER - For COWBOY POET DIARY

I APOLOGIZE *PROFUSELY* For my absence.

Domynoe's Mock Cover - The Assassin's Choice - Denyse Loeb

First Apologies - then I'll do a cover...

Ta dah - Here she is... LOL

Grrrrr... Internet ISP down for days...

Larry Moon - Blue Moon Productions - Intimate Reflections Mock Cover

Michelle As Leigh Royals Mock Cover - Contance of The Carolinas

Please Go Visit Alexandra - She's not feeling well...

Rene Miller - Mock Cover - The Darkest Midnight

Sela Carsen - Mock Cover for COLD RUNE!

Justin Rodgers Updates

Anyone else up for a cover?

THE BROWN TROUT - An HONOR to do - Mock Cover

Desie - Dracul Mock Cover...

MG Tarquini - Mock Cover For Lala Scrivano!

Savannah - Faith - Bernita - Tanya and other Erotica Authors!

Some days are more creative than others...

Jo Bourne's Cover

The Trickle....

If You Could, Would You? And for how long? Tell me the story....

Snark Contest

Princess of Two Loves...

Crafty Chica Cover - This one was fun!

LMAO!

Lisa Pulliam - Cursed to Hate, Bound to Love Mock Cover

Ray Rhamey - Vampire Kitty-Cat Cover

Not ignoring you...

Savannah's new Hottie Cover... *G*

A Word about My Art talents... Or lack thereof

Lauren Roberts - Biblio Buffet Cover

MaggieZ - The Cover

Cover For Miss Snark

Crapometer Posting - Looking for Serious Feedback

For Karl... I hope you enjoy this...

For Jeff... His Cover...

OK - so I got in the Mood to make another one...

Savannah's New Made Up Cover.

News on Justin - for those who want to know...

Crime Dragon - Prologue / Chapters 1 - 3 Links

Blogrolling With Lady M

To Justin - Dude, Am I Glad!

Crime Dragon - Chapter 3 published FINALLY - how weird.

Test. Blogger Issues STILL?

Woohoooo! I WON...

Crime Dragon - Chapter 3

Color Test from Emeraldcite's Blog - Whoa... Dude...

Bob's One Wish - Still looking for some interesting tidbits

OK now here's the Interactive part of the Story...

VERY FIRST Rejection Response - Should I be totally Happy?

Crime Dragon - Chapter 2

Crime Dragon - Chapter 1

Crime Dragon - Prologue *and why it was written*

Yep! It's official! I'm an idiot and now I'm on an idiot mission...

Alaska isn't Antartica

Blogrolling - Awesome New Toy - Don't Have It? GET IT!

My Writing Quote of the day...

Some days were just meant to be hung over...

OMG - Have you ever seen a head louse?

Argggghhh... Work in 3 hours and Blogspot keeps going down.

I just realized... Same blog template as Emeraldcite...

Eeeeeevil... Just Eeeeeeevil... Pinkie to mouth

To Technorati or Not? Any Blog Templates out there?

Changing the landscape still... Hold on to your hats!

I'm working on the blog... Watch where you step...

On the Fly and Ellipsis Queen...

Erotica on the fly... OVER 18 ONLY!

The Wind doth Call...

Miss Snark has no more comments... Sad...

If you haven't checked out this blog - get your waterproof chair

On A Whim... Because Miss Snark Said... LOL!

Sad News...

Cough... Hack... Cough... Sorry about that loogie...

Recipe... Salmon / Halibut Poppers

Yah OK. Try me. - gimme 8 words...

I APOLOGIZE PROFUSELY For my absence.

Savannah's new Hottie Cover... G

Crime Dragon - Prologue and why it was written